Blissful Arrangement
by sosise
Summary: Kanou and Ayase were shocked to know that actually Ayase is a hermaphrodite XXY gene . M-preg. fluff. A CHAPTER RATED M INSIDE.
1. Chapter 1 Epilogue

Thank you for Twelf Bell san for the beta reading my story. I have editted it since.

This is my first fanfic for Okane ga Nai. please kindly review~!

Enjoy!

* * *

Ayase and Kanou couldn't believe their ears.

"Can you… repeat that?"

"Ayase-san is pregnant." the doctor answered shakily.

"WHAT?" Kanou released his rage at the doctor's table. "What nonsense are you talking about?"

"I am not… talking nonsense." The doctor, now small and covering himself on the corner of the room, trembled. "He's pregnant."

"No! No way! I'm a man!" Ayase argued in a whine.

"You're a special case. I just got a report from the lab that you actually are a XXY gene, which means you're hermaphroditic. Usually, people like this are sterile. However, I think your case is different since I can now tell you for sure that an embryo has developed in your tummy."

"So…so you mean… I am… carrying a child?"

"Yes. And it's 5 weeks old. The hormone imbalance has taken its toll on you already; that's why you always felt dizzy and wanted to throw up each morning. Did you not crave for some special food recently?"

Kanou remembered that Ayase was unusually craving for spicy and sour food this month. He kept cooking something spicy and sour; not that he minded, of course. He liked it too, especially if it was Ayase's cooking. He also remembered that Ayase had becoming a lot softer recently… the silky skin was now rather glowing in an erotic way and he swore he could see Ayase's chest developing. _It was just my imagination_, he thought. But now that he got the real explanation, his imagination turned to truth.

That's meant he was going to be a father.

"Ayase…." Kanou was ready to give Ayase the softest hug, the hottest kiss and also the most gentle kind of love he could make, but stopped when he saw Ayase whimpering and pale-looking. He clearly couldn't comprehend what was said about him.

"I… pregnant? Me…? I'm a male… no… I … pregnant? No way!"

Ayase was in denial; he started to clutchd his face with his own nails. He started to cry. _No way!_ He was a male from birth; it was clear since he never felt like he needed women things. _I'm a man!_ That was the only thing he could proud himself off now. If he was a male, he could live alone just fine. A male was the stronger gender in term of bodily strength and Ayase always needed that.

"I know you find it hard to believe. I think it is also impossible to happen, but something may have pushed you into this. Maybe too much bodily contact; it can make your body work like a female and try to conceive. Due to your XXY gene, you already have some potential eggs inside your body and an underdeveloped organ, if you ask me. But if you don't want it, I can arrange some operation to take it off."

"Take it off?" Ayase trailed off.

"Yes. In other words: abort the baby and take the whole vestigial organ away."

_No way!_ He might have been in denial, but he would never abort a life! It's precious and aborting it means… _NO!_

"Ayase. Calm down." Kanou pulled Ayase's frail body closer to him. "Can you really not comprehend this fact?"

"I…I'm just too… too.."

"To be honest… I'm happy that you're having my child. Aren't you?"

Ayase blushed. _Oh my._ It was just last month that they had actually reached a mutual understanding after the Yamato-kun incident. It was the starting point of when he started to receive Kanou's body and feelings honestly. And thinking about it now, maybe that was the starting point of his body turning into female. He knew something was off; his body felt softer, his tummy was becoming bigger and his chest… it was kinda developing in a way. And whenever Kanou touches his body… he shudders just because of the sensation. His stomach flutters, too. It always felt like he was copulating.

"I… maybe I am…"

"...Good." Kanou kissed him. Softly at first, but when their lips locked, Kanou slipped his tongue in and played with Ayase's soft mouth. Ayase, oblivious of the teasing, felt a warm erotic sensation growing and let a deep moan go.

Ayase, finally realizing his situation, pushed Kanou. "No! Stop! There's people here… please restrain until we get home…"

The doctor nodded in agreement. He couldn't talk; he was honestly turned on by the erotic little boy in front of him. He was prettier than any girl; frail and more delicate than a princess but possessed a stubborn will greater than a bull. Kanou sighed and covered Ayase's body with his arms.

"Yeah. Fine." He pulled Ayase into his arms and left the room.

* * *

XD I rewritten some of the parts. Since ff .nt changed the format, I need to rewrite everything. XD

Please review?


	2. Chapter 2 Fact

This is the beta-ed version. Thank you for my dear Beta Twelf-Bell san~! XD I am indebted forever, really.

ENJOY!

* * *

"We're home." Kanou gently released the protective arm he had put around Ayase's hips. Ayase blushed. Since the doctor had said he was pregnant ( about an hour ago), Kanou had become so gentle to the point where Ayase felt weird. Kanou had held him gently with his arm protectively around his waist, letting Ayase walk slowly as if he can fall anytime soon. He even put the seat belt on and off for Ayase, opened the door for him and volunteered to carry him upstairs – which was objected heavily by Ayase due to any further embarrassment.

Ayase couldn't believe himself. How can he, with 'male' labeled on his ID card and raised for almost 19 years as a normal male, be pregnant? Moreover, he's a hermaphrodite? The whole science fact thing hadn't fully processed in his head, but now he was scared. _What is pregnancy? What happens in pregnancy?_ It felt like a whole new alien term for him. _Pregnancy? Baby? Don't joke around!_

"Ayase... are you okay?" Kanou asked worriedly. Ayase snapped back from his wandering mind and faked a smile.

"I'm fine, Kanou-san."

"Then let's go in."

Ayase moved his feet a step. But he lost his balance since he had stepped on an uneven front stair. He fell forward, head first. But Kanou, maybe because of reflex from taking care of clumsy Ayase for so long, quickly grabbed Ayase's waist and made himself the shield for Ayase. They ended up lying on the floor, Ayase on top of Kanou.

"Ouch. Are you alright, Ayase?"

"I'm fine. Ah, sorry! Are you okay, Kanou-san?" Ayase panicked since it looked like Kanou had hit his head hard on the floor. Kanou smiled.

"I'm fine. I'm more worried about you and your clumsiness. If only I can stay and look after you 24/7."

"Kanou...san..."

"You can even fall in this kind of place. No wonder the insurance company lost so much money for some stupid case. Well, let's go in and have dinner."

"Ah! I'm sorry! I'll make the food right away! Kanou-san, please enjoy yourself with a bath while I prepare something."

"I prefer taking a bath together."

"Kanou-san!" Ayase blushed, even though he knew that for Kanou Somuku, sex is food. Still, he felt shy whenever Kanou make a move on him.

Kanou chuckled. "Fine. I'll take a bath while waiting."

Ayase tried his best to cook Kanou's favourite food. They enjoyed a light dinner and the nice atmosphere continued into a really hot session in bed (seems like Kanou became turned on by the fact that Ayase was now carrying his child). He didn't let Ayase sleep until he was satisfied; which was until dawn).

* * *

"I'm here, danna-sama." Someya Kaoruko entered the room. "Why the sudden emergency call? What is it?"

"You're here at last." Kanou stopped smoking and looked straight at the beautiful okama. "You know women stuff, don't you?"

"Well, I do pride myself on that. But... what's the connection?"

"What do you know about... pregnancy?"

"HUH? I thought you never want to know about how you were born... Why are you suddenly so interested in these things? Don't tell me, you made some woman pregnant? Are you crazy? You have Ayase..."

"STOP IT, YOU DAMN OKAMA! I would never betray Ayase, if it that's what you want to know. I just want to ask about pregnancy. Is it that strange?"

"Well, yes. Tell me the reason first and then I'll tell you what I know."

"Hah! Ridiculous. I don't have the obligation to tell you anything."

"...What happened with Ayase? Don't tell me, you want him to become pregnant with your baby or something?" Someya was joking to tease Kanou, but when she saw the stupid smile on Kanou's face, she became pale. "Hey, I don't care how great you are, but you can't go against nature, danna-sama. Don't forget that Ayase is a guy too. No matter how pretty and feminine he is."

"I'm not going against nature; he really is having mine."

"WHAT?" two voices in unison asked the same thing. Kanou looked annoyingly at both of the speakers: Someya and Kuba (older). They were pale. No wonder; the news was not a pleasant one. It was weird. Kanou secretly thought that he would receive some congratulation greetings from them, but judging from their frozen state, it didn't seem like he was going to receive anything after all.

"Hey, say something." Kanou barked at Someya, whom returned to reality.

"Oh my God, danna-sama... how many times did you push Ayase down until he could have your baby...? Oh my, poor Ayase...! He must be in pain right now! What did you do this time? Plant an ovum inside his frail body?"

"I've done nothing, okay? It's his gene; the doctor said he's a XXY and is actually half of both genders."

Someya looked at Kanou for a minute before sighing. "Well, that explains why he is so beautiful and out of this world. It's human nature to be attracted to other humans who have the least similar gene... no wonder Ayase is so delicate and attractive to others. Hmmm… that makes sense."

"Hey, are you going to tell me or not?" Kanou, who was already losing his patience, stared hard at the okama.

"Fine. I will gather all I know and give you a report tonight. But I can tell you something right now."

"Like?"

"You should give him more nutrients, especially calcium since the baby will absorb the nutrients from its mother. Keep his body warm – no hard exercise. It's also better for Ayase to take leave from his university for the time being. Don't overwork him, and yes, please restrain yourself from any body contact in the first and last tri-semester. It may harm the baby as well as the mother."

Kanou swallowed hard. He remembered last night's session. It was as good as heaven on earth and he couldn't stop even after Ayase kept begging him to stop and to let him rest. Kanou's bottom part was throbbing now; he could still feel the warmth and soft inside part of Ayase. He had planned on having another session tonight but now, it seemed impossible.

"... danna-sama. You must restrain yourself, you hear me?" Someya strictly scolded Kanou. "I know it's hard to hold back, but it's for Ayase's sake. Also, I will be coming over tomorrow to help him out."

"... Good." Kanou couldn't bring himself to say thank you. _Maybe Someya can somehow persuade Ayase to accept his condition now._ When he went to work that morning, Ayase was pale and it was clear that he hadn't really accepted his current condition yet. Kanou had no doubt that Ayase was crying alone in the bathroom right now. "I'll give him under your care."

Someya smiled. "It's not that bad, danna-sama. And I bet your baby is going to be the most adorable baby ever."

* * *

I rewrite and edit the chapter because ff . nt change its format so suddenly. what I usually used as the time breaker ( * * *) all gone. SUcks.

PLEASE REVIEW?

PLEASE FAVORITE?


	3. Chapter 3 The call

Thank you for Twelf Bell san for the beta reading my story.

Part three. Enjoy~!

* * *

"I'm home." Kanou couldn't bring up his usual enthusiasm. It felt like déjà vu – of the time he restrained himself from touching Ayase to follow that stupid little animal guide book from Someya. The more he knew he needed to be restrained, the more he felt aroused and the urgent the need to take Ayase down grew inside him. The fact that Ayase came and greeted him in the usual apron, but somehow looks two times cuter than usual, didn't help at all.

"Welcome back." Ayase smiled. Kanou could feel his heart bleed. "Gokurosama-deshita."

Ayase's sweet voice, Ayase's cute outfit, Ayase's blushing smile, Ayase's... Oh stop it! Kanou Somuku, 28 years old, facing the biggest dilemma he had ever since high school. Ayase was welcoming him like from one of his fantasies (the one he wouldn't ever admit and secretly wished to be the subject of Gion's AV plot) but now he dismissed it like it was nothing. It was really irritating for him. Should he take Ayase now and endanger Ayase's body or should he celibate for 9 months (or some time other — he couldn't really remember what Someya said). Well, let's settle it for 9 months. The fact that he had to wait 9 solid months made him want to cry out blood. 9 months... or Ayase?

The choice was obvious. But there was no way in hell he could celibate that long. He was a beast; he had unsuppressable lust that needed to be fulfilled every single day. While still thinking hard, he passed Ayase and went into the room. The room was filled with the nice smell of food. Kanou knew by heart that a delicious dinner was waiting for him.

"Kanou-san..."

"Hmm?" Kanou couldn't bring himself to look at Ayase. If he looked now, he might end up pinning Ayase down on the dining table.

"What happened? Are you sick or... tired?" Ayase asked worriedly. Kanou was surprised he asked.

"No, I'm fine. What's the matter?"

And then Kanou looked into Ayase's eyes... and saw the strange feeling peeking out from Ayase's blue orbs. Ayase wasn't smiling; he looked like he was worried, but there was something more...

"No, I mean... you look stressed and more unenergetic than usual..." Ayase couldn't bring up the next phrase he wanted to say: '_and you forgot to have your welcome back kiss.' _

"No, it's just a tiring day." Kanou sighed, sitting on the sofa, searching for another reason to make Ayase relieved. "My hand kinda hurts."

"Hand...? Oh! Kanou san! I'm so sorry!"

_Sorry? _Kanou whispered in his heart. Why was he apologizing for? But he knew what Ayase meant when he saw his hand – it was rather swollen with some blue marks around the wrist. Oh, maybe that's why he felt his hand was kinda irritating since earlier that morning. It was swollen because of yesterday night's accident. Great, now he made Ayase even more worried.

"Give me your hand, Kanou san." Ayase brought the first aid-kit box and pulled open the lid. He gently washed Kanou's hand with alcohol, pressing some cold ice on top of it and wrapping it over with a cold-plaster. Kanou stared at Ayase.

Ayase was more effeminate than a normal guy. His outer appearance harmonized with his personality. With golden soft hair and blue eyes, he was petite built and had a high pitched voice; he was more or less like a girl in guys clothing. He was gentle, delicate and soft-hearted – just like the stereotype of girls. Kanou knew it the best; Ayase had taken him, a stranger – moreover with a Yakuza-like face, into his house on that rainy night. Ayase called him kind when in fact, he could currently be the most malicious financial firm owner (he knew he was nothing compared to his old man and he was still aiming to beat his father in that sense). Kanou wondered how much Ayase had actually changed him.

Ayase's soft voice brought him back to reality. "I'm sorry... because of me, you're hurt like this."

_Come on_. Kanou sighed. _Don't drag this matter anymore_. Ayase knew how many times Kanou had been in either dangerous/confusing/emergency situations. And each time, Kanou had never felt so troublesome as long as Ayase was back and safe in his arms. His swollen wrist was nothing compared to them.

"I'm fine, Ayase. This is nothing."'

"... Kanou san..."

"Hm?" Kanou's stomach started rumbling. Maybe it was better to have dinner...

"Should I... leave this apartment?"

"WHAT?" _What the fu** was he talking about?_ "What do you mean?"

"I've been thinking about it for the whole day..."

"And?" Kanou couldn't link any reason to why Ayase suddenly suggested that weird but not-funny statement. _Ayase knows he still has a debt bond with me!_ And just when Kanou thought Ayase had finally accepted him...

"And since... I am not a whole man anymore... I thought you might be disgusted with me and decide to throw me out..."

"What?" Kanou couldn't help but drop his jaw. "Whole man? Disgusted? Whaddya mean?"

"Kanou-san is... aren't you gay?" Ayase shouted. "I thought you wouldn't like being embraced by a half like me... you don't like women, right? But I don't want to abort this life no matter what, so I think I will just leave and I promise I'll pay the rest of the debt my whole life..."

Ayase ranted things that conveniently blocked out Kanou's deadlock reasoning. He realized that Ayase was misunderstanding things. He? A gay? Hating Ayase because Ayase was carrying his baby? Want to kick Ayase out of his house? No way!

Kanou smacked the table. Ayase was surprised and seeked refuge behind the adjacent sofa. He trembled. It had been so long since the last time Kanou-san had broken the table into pieces like this.

"I am NOT a GAY, Ayase. I am more than HAPPY to know that you are actually the other gender, you know what I mean? After all my effort to make you stay with me until now, I suddenly want to kick you out just because of pregnancy? Are you... joking? It's not funny, Ayase Yukiya. And now... since your stupidity got to my brain, I..." Kanou was ready to pounce Ayase, regardless of what the damn Okama had warned him about. But then, his phone rang.

Ayase took the chance to run into the small closet inside their bedroom; his small sanctuary. Kanou opened his cell, ready to yell at whoever called him. Once Ayase put himself inside that closet, he was really hard to lure out. And now Kanou had no patience to wait for Ayase to come out; he might as well just rip the closet door open and force Ayase to bed.

"I told you not to attack him in the first three semesters, danna-sama." Someya's effeminate voice filled the phone as if she was an accurate fortune-teller. "And don't make him scared like you naturally do, you big bully."

"Hell, I don't care! AND WHY ARE YOU CALLING NOW? Give me a good reason or your father won't even have the chance to help you tomorrow."

"My, my. Calm down, danna-sama. I don't want to risk my life. But there are two things: I have finished the report and it will be sent to you tomorrow. If you kill me, you won't get it. And the other one is that Miya-san is coming back."

"What? Miya... you mean... _her_?"

"Yes. My father just told me and he asked me to remind you."

"..." Kanou couldn't talk. His mind was wandering along the familiar discomfort he had whenever he heard that name. She came back. Again. After all these years.

He put Someya off without telling her, and proceeded to the bedroom. He was in no mood whatsoever; his hunger and lust had gone – puff and away. He didn't even care to persuade Ayase to come out. What he managed to say was: "Ayase... you can stay there as long as you like. I'll be sleeping now. Suit yourself."

And he buried himself inside those soft and stuffy pillows. He couldn't care less about the world. All he wanted now was turn back time and to stop Someya from reminding him of that name again.

* * *

Ayase waited in agony. Should he come out? Kanou-san sounded so tired and sad... was it his fault again? Or was it just another cunning trick to lure him out of the closet like usual? Ayase knew that once he came out from the closet, he had no way out of what would happen next. He might end up panting and screaming, asking for more underneath the beast's wide and muscular chest. Last night was intense. He was still recovering from the after-pain of the action. Kanou kept thrusting in and out his body; liquid spilled everywhere and he was more aroused than he dared to admit – carrying another life inside your body made you feel rather... sexy. Especially how Kanou-san kept asking for more as if Ayase was so alluring...

But no way was Ayase gonna tell him that.

Silence followed. Then Ayase remembered the food. He need to heat it for Kanou-san. Maybe Kanou-san was in the bathroom; he could sneak out and heat the food for him. He gently opened the door, glad that Kanou wasn't around. Satisfied, he came out.

His heart nearly stopped beating when he saw Kanou's body in the middle of their bed. He froze, but then he realized that Kanou was really sleeping.

It was strange. Kanou-san never slept with his clothes on. Kanou was a big believer of pyjamas. And he hadn't even touched his food yet. Kanou-san was probably really hungry but Ayase knew he couldn't stand a hungry stomach while sleeping.

Something was off.

Ayase climbed onto the bed, softly touching Kanou's forehead. It was warm, but still rather normal. And he didn't even flinch when Ayase crawled onto the bed. Ayase was now really, really worried.

_What happened?_

* * *

Please review?

Well, I know I am shamless for begging for review, but well, there is no greater joy than reading a positive feedback, LOL! So please feed this empty soul!


	4. Chapter 4 Feelings

Thank you for my beta Twelf Bell san~!

Enjoy!

* * *

Kanou could feel cold sweat drip down his temple. It had been so long since he had nightmares. _SHIT!_ It was all because of that woman, the woman who was the root of all evil, the woman who was even more devilish than his demonic father, the woman who had no feelings and who ruined his childhood.

Kanou opened his eyes. Irritated, he yawned. He felt like he had been sleeping only for a short time. But he felt comfortable. Despite the cold weather, it was really warm and it smelled good... he found Ayase's chest right in front of his eyes. The chest softly moved in and out, following the soft breathing of his lover. Kanou smiled. He never knew he could call somebody his lover. Usually, all the women he slept with were all just companions. But now, he could proudly call Ayase his lover.

Ayase's hair felt soft on his forehead, and his lips were on Kanou's hair. Ayase's hands were wrapping him protectively, like a mother hen with her chicks. But since Ayase was smaller than Kanou, they looked like the letter 'g'. Kanou felt awkward. Usually, he was the one who held Ayase in his arms. He never fell asleep inside somebody's embrace like this. And Ayase's chest... was arousing him. Although it was perfectly covered by pyjamas, the nipples were kinda visible from the thin fabric of the pyjamas – a soft texture that felt like it were welcoming him to lick them, and it was only a tongue away from his face...

_Stop it._ Kanou bit his own tongue. It hurt but it was enough to remind him of his common sense. He was not going to attack Ayase now, even more so after Ayase had been holding him the whole night. And honestly, he felt moved by the gesture. The gentleness Ayase had shown him so many times had been deepened by this current action. By embracing Kanou tightly, Ayase had shown his concern and acceptance towards Kanou. And that meant Kanou had made another successful step. The day when Ayase'll accept him completely will come soon... hopefully.

Kanou then realized he was sleeping with his working clothes on. _Heck!_ How come he was sleeping without pyjamas? _Oh yeah..._ that woman and the okama's warning. _Shit._ Kanou decided he should call the okama later to ask for more information.

But for now, he indulged himself in Ayase's warm embrace... the nice smell of Ayase with soft gentle skin wrapped around him... If only he could lock Ayase inside this place and never let him out so people couldn't see Ayase, and that way, he could monopolize Ayase's everything... his hair, his skin, his lips, his body, their child... and Ayase's heart. If only Ayase would remember and time stopped now...

He felt weak. After getting Ayase in his arms, Kanou knew he was getting weaker and weaker. He was being strong in order to protect Ayase, but inside... he had became more vulnerable. People began to know of his main weak point of his and someday, they might use it against him. And this main weak point was of course: Ayase. If something were to happen to Ayase, he would go crazy; worse come to worst, he might be a mass murderer before commiting suicide. And since Ayase was so delicate... he would definitely break if they tortured him... _no!_ The image gave Kanou the chills and then goosebumps. _Shit._ Kanou involuntarily pulled Ayase closer, grasping the thin waist protectively, causing Ayase to flinch a bit. Kanou released his grip right away, and softly patted the pretty creature.

He decided to increase the security around the house and assign Kuba to be Ayase's shadow. Or better still... maybe the okama was right. Ayase should just take leave for the whole 9 months; it would ease him of his stress and make everything easier. Kanou smiled. He had to persuade Ayase tomorrow to take leave from the college. He thought of ways to persuade Ayase... well, he could just take him under and force himself, or not let Ayase come until he said yes... but since it was now forbidden, he searched for better options.

Kanou felt more peaceful and slowly drifted back to sleep. The comfort around him was addictive. He hugged Ayase's pregnant hips gently and pulled them closer to his chest. Inside there was his child... and the thought was enough to make him feel like he was the happiest man in the entire world.

* * *

"Ah, as cute as usual, sweetheart." Someya smiled when Ayase opened the door.

"Someya-san! What a surprise! Come on in!"

"Thank you, darling. But can you call that monster from his slumber and meet me in the living room? We have something to discuss, Ayase. And later... let me take you out."

"Uh? Take me out?"

"We need to buy baby clothes don't we? And we need to check everything... I'm going to get you the best pediatrician in town and we'll see whether or not we can put Kanou inside the delivering room..."

"Someya-san!" Ayase blushed and it looked like he was ready to cry anytime soon. His teary eyes looked disbelievingly at Someya. "Who... Who told you...?"

"Well, danna-sama of course. He was bragging about it yesterday to us."

"... U...us?"

"Yes, me and (the) Kuba(s) as usual. He's such a bully. Hah! Tell me, he did not force you to do anything yesterday, did he?"

"...Ye...yes." Ayase remembered he was almost forced down. But since the phone call, Kanou was strange. "Was it your call yesterday night?"

"Oh, yes, it was me." Someya smiled. They entered the living room and Ayase rushed to serve tea. Someya looked carefully at Ayase, and sighed.

"I have no idea how he made you conceive. I mean, although you are a hermaphrodite, usually they are sterile. It will only be productive if 'pushed' if you know what I mean. How long and hard did he do you?"

Ayase went red, as red as the red button on the electric kettle. Someya smiled. Ayase's reaction told everything. But still... somehow it was making her happy. She had been looking at Kanou since childhood. They were not friends and neither were they family, but it just felt natural to have each other and to quarrel non-stop. Kanou had been gloomy and antisocial since his childhood, but it had worsened since the incident with that woman. Now, Kanou had turned better. At least he had begun to trust and value people other than himself. And he was more human-like now. All... maybe thanks to Ayase's influence. This innocent (well, not oh-so innocent anymore but innocently pure in mind) child had changed danna-sama for the better.

Or maybe for the worst.

Someya didn't know the future, but he was happy that this child was here with Kanou. Kanou needed him.

* * *

"Kanou san... wake up..."

"Nggh... give me 5 more minutes..."

"Someya-san is already here..."

Someya? What was that okama doing inside the house? Kanou massaged his temple before getting up quickly. Yeah, the problem was waiting and he had no time to sleep anymore. He looked around and found Ayase sitting beside him, smiling although looking worried.

"Yesterday... you were warm, Kanou-san. I think you might have fever... isn't it better to take a day's rest?"

"I'm fine. Just give me my suit." Kanou sat upright and patted Ayase's soft golden hair. "Don't worry, I was just tired."

"..." Ayase clearly looked worried, but he kept his silence. Kanou had been strange since last night. He was worried. Last night, Kanou was talking in his dream, mumbling something similar to a 'help' and 'why'. It was clear that he wasn't having a nice dream. Kanou was sweating drops and drops of perspiration, his body all tense and he looked tortured. Ayase couldn't help but pull the guy closer, calming him down; patting him like a child, making sure the nightmare left him. Ayase wondered maybe Kanou had never been treated like that since Kanou's body suddenly went tense and he struggled against the embrace, but after forcing his hand to stay still and keep on whispering 'it's fine' to him, Kanou finally relaxed and stopped struggling.

He fell asleep soon after that, with the warmth of Kanou's strong and masculine body on his chest. Holding Kanou's face against his chest was a risky move of course, but he felt that Kanou needed it. He remembered when he was small, his dad always pulled him closer and they embraced each other before sleeping. It was always lonely since his mother was always in the hospital for as long as he remembered, but his dad proved to be a really attentive father. Whenever Ayase had a nightmare, his dad would always whisper softly and hug him. Ayase felt safe, like he didn't care about all the monsters in the world 'cause his dad was there and his dad loved him. Maybe that was the reason he hugged Kanou. Maybe he wanted to convey the feeling that someone was always there for you...

_Does that mean I'm in love with Kanou-san?_

The thought of it made him blush.

* * *

"You looked awful! Yuck! Please shave before meeting a lady, at least!" Someya held her handkerchief by her mouth and pretended to act like she was sick. "Such a bad man..."

"Shut up. Where's the report? And the other matter..."

"She will arrive in Japan in 2 days. She's coming back for a work reason. Well, you know what work. Anyhow, this is the report." Someya pulled out a thick document from his bag. But before Kanou could touch it, she pulled it back to herself.

"Hey, OKAMA! I'm in no mood for playing tug-of-war!" Kanou felt his blood pressure rising. Ayase smiled and put the saucer on the table.

"No. I won't give this until you promise me one thing." Someya smiled.

"What?"

"Don't you feel cruel, making Ayase a single parent outside of marriage?" Someya wiped her pretend-tears. "You should at least give him a wedding band, danna-sama."

Ayase dropped the saucer but luckily, it landed on a soft part of the carpet and didn't break. His whole body turned red. "...So...Someya-sa...san..."

"Ah." Kanou smiled. "Yeah. Good thing you reminded me of that. Geez... how did I forget?"

"Good." Someya smiled and put the documents on the table. She helped Ayase pick up the saucer and patted the boy's golden hair. "And I planned to take him out today. I'll take him to the best pediatrician and do some shopping."

"Someya-san... I...I don't have the money!" Ayase looked pale, but also red. He looked lost; he didn't know whether he should blush or become pale. Shopping was outside his vocabulary; he knew he would eventually need to buy some baby stuff... but shopping with Someya-san meant expensive stuff and he didn't have the money...

"Well, aren't you silly? Of course it will be danna-sama's bill." Someya smiled, eyeing Kanou who looked happy. Kanou was busy looking through the papers, and he kept smiling as if it were a new toy and very interesting. Kanou looked up. "Yeah, of course it's my tab, Ayase."

"Ka...Kanou san... but I don't want to increase my debt!"

"Hey, listen to me, Ayase." Kanou pulled Ayase onto his thigh, nudging Ayase's cheek with his nose. Ayase flinched from the unshaved whiskers on Kanou's face. "I know it will be added to your debt. However, I'll only receive one payment for the maternal fee, and that is you must deliver my child safely into this world. Understand? Isn't it fair?" Kanou smiled.

Ayase blushed, ready to cry with embarrassment (why did Kanou like to show off their relationship in front of other people, especially with people that they knew?) and confusion (was this Kanou's way of saying he'll pay? Or did Ayase need to really pay him back in the future?). Someya smiled looking at the sweet scene in front of her.

"Yes, danna-sama. I have booked him at 12, which is why we need to get going." Someya stood to take over the tea tray and cleaned up while Kanou was busy smooching Ayase and touching him all over like an octopus with 10 hands. "However, I think for the best, you should assign someone with us. Just for... safety, you know."

Kanou automatically hugged Ayase tightly – so tight that Ayase found it hard to breathe. "I'll assign Kuba with you. And you... take care of Ayase." Kanou looked stern, before adding awkwardly, "...please."

Someya blushed. Oh! That was the first time in her life she had ever heard the magic word from Kanou! It was worth capturing on video, but Kanou had already taken Ayase into the room.

"Don't force him down, danna-sama." Someya chuckled. Kanou growled.

Ayase grabbed Kanou's neck tightly, hoping he could still walk after this.

* * *

Please review?

Shameful as it is, I love review~ I cherished and reread them~


	5. Chapter 5 Doctor check up

I was never good in giving names. I wonder why my turtle names are turtle one, two, three...

Thank you for my lovely beta san Twelf Bell!

Enjoy!

* * *

The door was knocked on rudely. "Danna-sama! Please let go of Ayase! We have an appointment in 10 minutes!"

Kanou sighed. Ayase was half undressed in front of him, eyes full of tears but face flushed due to the wonderful sensation from Kanou's skillful tongue. They hadn't even reached first base yet; Kanou had spend almost 15 minutes just cuddling and making kiss marks all over Ayase's neck and chest.

"I think I'll continue this tonight." Kanou smirked and kissed Ayase softly on his cheek. "Prepare yourself. Just think of me."

"Ng... Ngh..." Ayase was still in the middle of blissful euphoria. His whole body was weak and shivering from delight. He could only manage a nod. Kanou smiled widely. He was satisfied since he had made Ayase this 'happy'.

Ayase calmed himself down while Kanou helped him button back his shirt.

"Ka... Kanou... san..."

"Hmm?"

Two hands gently touched Kanou's cheeks. Two cerulean orbs stared at him.

"Are you... happy with having... a child with me...?"

Kanou sighed while trying to suppress his stupid smile. He smirked. "Yeah. I'm really happy. I'm looking forward to it. What kind of baby will come out of you?"

"_What kind?_"

"Well, I wouldn't mind a beautiful daughter."

Ayase smiled. He just had this feeling that Kanou would be a really protective father if they had a daughter. A warm sensation filled his chest.

"Ayase, let me tell you something."

Kanou suddenly sounded so serious that Ayase couldn't help but jerk upwards and face him straight. Kanou waited for a while, looking like he was deciding whether he should say it or not. But in the end, he opened his mouth.

"I never thought I would have child. I never thought I would have any sort of family either. But I do now and I am happy. Really. Thank you."

Ayase blushed. Kanou turned and hid his blushing face to the door, feeling awkward and walked as fast as he could, leaving Ayase on the bed.

* * *

"Relax, Ayase. This pediatrician is my old friend. He's good."

"Eh? A he?"

"Yes. He's the best in this town, maybe even in this country. Try me; I always know the best." Someya smiled. The doctor in front of them smiled weakly.

"Hi, Someya."

"Hi, Kudo. Long time no see. How are you?"

"I'm fine. And I see you are still as beautiful as ever." The male doctor smiled while opening his file. He looked like he was in his thirties. His head was shaved short and clean – he looked like he was more like a rugby player (complete with the muscles) rather than a pediatrician. But his white jacket was worth drooling for. Ayase was sure that the doctor had his own women fan club. He looked comfortable with Someya and Ayase couldn't help but wonder what kind of relationship the two had.

"So... you are here with your friend... ermm... and he is pregnant?"

"Yes. Let me introduce him to you. Ayase, this is Kudo Hattori; he is my good friend and the best doctor around. He's a profesional pervert though; that's why he chooses this job. Kudo, this is Ayase Yukiya, Kanou's wife."

"So...Someya san..." Ayashe blushed upon the title Someya gave him.

"Oh, nice to meet you, Kanou's wife." Kudo smiled and offered his hand for handshake. "He's famous in our circle, that inhuman beast. Well, he's gotten himself quite a catch, hasn't he? Very cute spouse indeed. But relax, Ayase-san. I'm not much as a pervert as Someya said."

"Oh...yes." Ayase smiled, receiving the offered hand. "Nice to meet you too."

"Are you sure you're a man?"

Ayase stopped smiling and froze for a moment before eventually answered softly. "Well... I think I am."

"Hmm... interesting. I don't meant to doubt you, it is just curiousity." Kudo smiled and walked from behind his desk. "This is the first time I've had a case like yours. I want to check you; please lay down on the bed."

"Kudo; I warn you not to do anything to him or you'll know what will happen..." Someya smiled devilishly.

Kudo smiled back and sighed. "I won't, Someya. You know whom I've pledged my life and love to."

Now, Someya blushed but kept his face behind her handkerchief and looked away.

* * *

~15 minutes later~

"I've checked and it is true: you are pregnant... While it is still too early to know what gender it is, I can assure you it is growing nicely. However... I must warn you one thing." Kudo looked at the test results.

Ayase waited tensely.

"This is a weird case. Since your ovary is a vestigial and wasn't meant to be used, it is weaker and less functioned than a normal womb. I suggest you better check up every month and be more cautious with yourself. I think the umbilical cord is developing nicely, so I think the baby is safe for now. But one thing..."

"Yes?"

"Since you don't have... ehm, another stretchable 'hole' to push the baby out..." Kudo looked awkward while Ayase wanted to bury himself in a nearby hole. "I think we better opt for caesarean. It's dangerous. Women are fine, but male pregnancy or in this case – hermaphroditic, I'm afraid the operation may reduce you to very weak condition, or even death. The possibility of failure is quite high; it's 42% due to the high possibility of internal bleeding. I suggest you think about it first. You may choose to abort it now since it is still small, or you can gamble with fate for the operation."

"Kudo! Can you say that in a softer manner?" Someya was shocked, clutching her handkerchief while grabbing Ayase's trembling body with her other hand.

"I'm trying to make it as concise as possible. I did not mean to scare you. Pardon me." Kudo looked genuinely sorry. Ayase smiled and refused the apology, since the doctor had no mistake to forgive.

"I... I think I'm fine." Ayase smiled. "I will carry on. I don't want to abort this... life." He touched his tummy softly, feeling awkward but tender at the same time, "And please... can you keep this a secret from Kanou-san? I want to make him happy. He said he was so happy with the prospect of having a baby and a family... so... I don't want to let him down."

Ayase looked so happy and sounded full of affection for Kanou that Someya and Kudo couldn't help but be moved. Someya smiled. "You're a good child. I'm happy for Kanou that he has you."

"Me too. I will assist you with all I can and with my best." Kudo smiled. "I can now see why Someya said you're good for Kanou."

Ayase went out and waited in the waiting lounge while Someya and Kudo spoke privately. Someya had blushed when Kudo asked her whether she could spare some time to speak privately with him. Ayase felt that they must have 'something'. Maybe it was a female's instinct?

_Stop it_! Ayase scolded himself. _You are not a woman!_

* * *

He didn't want to disturb the two, so he went out and waited. There was only one woman sitting in the lounge. She looked like she was in her 30s, and she was very beautiful although one can feel that the beauty was artificial.

He sat down, and the woman looked at him. She stared for a good 5 minutes before eventually smiling. The smile reminded him of someone he knew well. The woman noticed that Ayase had realized she was staring at him, and she spoke in a silky clear tone.

"Hi. Are you here for check up?"

Ayase nodded. "Yes. Are you... too?"

"Hmm. You may say that. Well, I hope your baby is well. You're very pretty. The baby will turn out very pretty too."

"Thank... thank you." Ayase blushed.

The woman smiled. "Your first pregnancy?"

"Yes." Well, actually he shouldn't ever have one.

"It's fine. It's scary and annoying at first, but children can be... precious in the end."

She looked so sad, Ayase couldn't help but feeling sorry and worried. But then, she immediately lit up tobacco and smoked, ignoring the _no smoking_ sign on the wall.

Ayase felt his cell phone vibrate. He excused himself and went out to receive the phone call. The woman nodded at him and continued enjoying her cigaratte.

"How is it?" Kanou didn't even say hallo. Ayase sighed. Kanou was so rude sometimes.

"It's fine. The doctor said.."

"No, I mean a boy or a girl?" Kanou cut off Ayase's explanation, clearly impatient to ask the matter.

"W...We don't know yet... it's still too small..."

"And you're in that Kudo-shitty's place, aren't you?"

"Kanou-san! Kudo is a good sensei (doctor)!"

"You don't know him. He's a pervert like Gion, but more professional. Tell me if he touches you or anything, Ayase. I'll make sure he dies slowly at the bottom of the sea."

"Kanou-san!"

"Ayase-kun? Let's go... Ah, is it danna-sama on the line?" Someya asked smoothly. Ayase nodded. Someya took the phone and smiled. "Danna sama, don't worry. I am with him."

_That's why I'm worried, okama! _Ayase could hear Kanou-san shout in the phone. Someya smirked before answering back in her best nuturing tone.

"Ah, don't be such a narrow minded guy. I'm taking him off for some shopping now. See you."

Someya closed the phone abruptly. He pulled Ayase towards the door.

"Ah, Someya-san... have you finished talking with Kudo-san?"

"Yes." Someya blushed. "Don't mind him. Let's go shopping."

* * *

"Someya-san... I think this is more than enough..."

"No! You need more than that! We've only been to 5 shops!"

"But we've already bought so many..." Ayase looked worriedly at the growing mountain of package bags in Kuba's hands. Kuba (younger) didn't care, while having 10 bags in each hand. He looked like a walking hanging-pole.

"Well, I have finished buying maternity dresses for you... and some nice panties for danna-sama; he should be thankful to me... We've gotten the baby accessories... and now, we need to buy the baby clothes!"

"But... we don't know what gender it is..."

"I know it will be a girl. Trust my instinct, Ayase-kun." Someya smiled. "And I think we need some bras too – to support your growing breasts."

"Someya-san!" Ayase blushed so deeply that he couldn't go any redder than that.

Someya chuckled and entered the next store.

* * *

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	6. Chapter 6 Request

Iyeey~! hahaha, thanks a lot for my dear beta-san Twelf Bell.

Sorry for being such a lousy writer.

Enjoy~!

* * *

"And then we bought these." Ayase pulled out a bib from the plastic bags. Baby related things were scattered around the two (Ayase and Kanou). Possessive as usual, Kanou asked Ayase to tell him details blow by blow of his day. After satisfiying himself with Ayase's promise about how 'safe' Kudo-sensei was, Kanou changed his interest to the mountains of stuff beside the sofa.

"What is _this_?" Kanou took it from Ayase's hands and stretched the bib (FYI: a bib is the type of clothing that babies wear on their neck so that the food they eat don't spill on their clothes). Ayase tried to stop him. "Kanou-san... it's not for stretching... it's for protecting the clothes from being spilled on when the baby eats..."

"Oh, so they need these? I don't remember having ever used this."

Ayase smiled awkwardly. Well, it was normal that people don't remember that they had ever used a bib, but for Kanou-san's case, Ayase could tell that he had never really used a bib though he remembered everything from his infanthood. Kanou smiled, playing further with the bib.

"Hey, why are all these pink?"

"Someya-san said the baby..." Ayase blushed, "will be a girl."

"Oh? Good then." Kanou put down the bib and searched for another thing to toy with. "I can't think of you producing any other kind of baby anyway."

"Kanou-san!"

"Hey, what's this?" Kanou pulled out a pair of baby's socks. They were the softest of pink with two little cherries hanging from each side.

"That's the baby's socks, Kanou-san."

"Heh... don't you think it's really small? It won't even cover my middle finger..."

"Kanou-san!"

Kanou smiled. "I never knew babies were these small." He looked amused and happy at the same time. He looked like a little boy who just got a massive amount of new toys. Childishly happy, he started to rummage through all the other things that Someya bought.

Ayase felt like he was ready to cry anytime soon. He was emotional nowadays; he had the reason to (Kudo told him he was going to be very, very emotional these months due to hormonal imbalance and pregnancy), but looking at this deliriously happy Kanou-san digging through the stuff made Ayase feel like he was the happiest man (woman?) ever. He felt like he had given Kanou the best thing ever; Kanou had stayed smiling for more than two days now.

_Was this happiness?_

* * *

Kanou smiled. The box in front of him glimmered with a sparkling aura. He felt satisfied with himself. Kuba (older) froze on the spot; in the end, he managed to put the documents on top of the table before heading head first to the door. A smiling Kanou was already scary... and now, Kanou was laughing with his nose.

_It's so damn scary._

Kuba (younger) suddenly knocked on the door. "Kanou-san, a woman wants to meet you."

"Who?" Kanou put the box inside his drawer immediately. "Don't let any okamas in."

"I am not an okama, dear Somuku." A woman who seemed to be in her mid thirties came elegantly into the room. "That's so bad; have you forgotten me?"

"...Miya." Kanou's body tensed and the discomfort churned his stomach. He turned to dangerous mode; his muscles were ready to punch the woman in front of him anytime.

"I'm here to make a business preposition." Miya invited herself to the sofa. Her long legs were covered by a short office skirt. She looked sexy though not yet vulgar. And her smile... reminded Kuba (older) of his boss.

"I have no intention of making any business with you." Kanou said coldly. "Get out from this room, woman."

"Come on, dear. This is very profitable for both of our sides."

"But it has a high risk; I don't want to throw away the balance just because of a few bucks worth."

"You've changed. Hey; you weren't this coward before."

Kanou gritted his teeth. "I'm not a coward. I've just come back to my common sense, bitch."

"5 months. 5 months of help. I have this new marijuana deal with Brazilian 'moguls' and I need your company to laundry money. You'll get 5%. How's that?"

"... I said no."

"8%."

"... No."

"13%. Plus some tips from them. Hey, come on. This deal isn't as bad as you think. We have our own modus, and we're really professional with what we do."

"..." Kanou knew that the deal wasn't that bad. In fact, it was a really good deal though with a high risk. But as long as it was covered, the profit could be tripled. He used to do this years before his father died. He could do this. His subordinates were pros in this stuff – moreover, they were experienced and had high self-defence. This didn't sound bad. He could just pull this off... but his hand accidentally opened the drawer and the box made him remember something.

Ayase.

_If only he didn't have Ayase..._

_Shit._ Kanou sighed. He couldn't do this. The risk was too high. He was in great danger: if he received the offer, Ayase would most likely be affected. In fact, Ayase might be targeted if he took the risk. No way. Ayase was having their baby and Kanou didn't want to risk them just for money. Kanou knew it wasn't like him; it was the first time Kanou had ever valued something over money.

"What's wrong with you? I've never thought you to be this restless. You always decide what you want to do straight away and live along with it. Remember?"

"Yeah." Kanou gritted his teeth. This woman in front of him had planted that advice deep down in his subconsciousness. She smiled like how he remembered. The smile that was always accompanied by a black shadow. This was the scary woman who killed his father. This was the scary woman... who gave him life.

"I don't want you to turn out like him – he was too soft." She lit up her cigarettes. "Don't blame me; it was his own fault he died."

"I don't blame you. The both of you deserve to die anyway."

She smiled. "As rebellious as ever, my dear son Kanou Somuku. Accept this deal, or I'll harm your new... uhm lover? Or boy toy?"

"..." Kanou wanted to burst. _How does she know about Ayase?_ But he knew he that he had to keep his calm and act like he didn't get the hint.

"What lover?"

"Oh, that lovely little boy... uhm, girl? Well, he's cute. I wonder how much Arab princes will pay for him. Such beautiful skin and perfect eyes... I would like to keep his eyes myself."

"Don't. Touch. Him."

"And he has your baby, am I wrong? A rare pet. " Miya smiled and smoke came through her lips. "Since when did you become this family-orientated? I thought you hated your own parents?"

"... Shut up, bitch."

"Don't forget that you are the son of this bitch." Miya grimly smiled. "I'll give you 2 days. It's enough to say yes. You know where I'm staying. And don't try to back up – I hold all the cards now. Alfred; we're going."

"Yes, madam." A guy in his mid-forties suddenly came through the door and opened it for Miya. He bowed down to Kanou before closing the door behind them.

Kanou gritted his teeth and punched the wall. He created a hole; the hand that Ayase bandaged hurt. But that couldn't appease his anger and his fright. He knew he was becoming weaker. He now had something to protect and he couldn't live as carefree as he used to be. Ayase had become a burden.

But no; Ayase was never a burden. Ayase had taught him how to be human, how to enjoy a normal life and how to appreciate others. He had given him love, affection and family. Ayase clearly was not a burden. Ayase helped him when he was in the lowest state of his life. Kanou couldn't surrender the happiness he had experienced these days. He couldn't give it up just for a sum of money... _SHIT!_

Ayase had done so much for him. Now it was his turn to get him something back. But now... he couldn't give the thing inside the box to Ayase anymore.

* * *

Kanou was still intrigued when he entered the mansion. Ayase came and welcomed him back with a smile. Kanou felt like he couldn't face Ayase honestly. It was his fault that Ayase's life was now in danger. Drug dealers are the worst; they have so many ways and so little passion for others. Once the drug kicks in, they can even kill family members.

"Kanou san... are you ok?" Ayase touched Kanou's hand. "You look pale... are you tired?"

No, he wasn't tired at all. He was alert. He kept looking around, ordering the Kuba brothers to keep guard and to increase the security level. He felt restless and he checked everywhere he went, looking out for some car trailing him.

Ayase looked so fragile. _SHIT! He wouldn't last if they tortured him!_ Kanou couldn't imagine the worst. He just couldn't imagine anything.

If only he could keep Ayase in his pocket so that he could be with him wherever he went. If only he could keep Ayase in the bedroom forever so he that he will never be seen nor hurt by the other party. If only Ayase was a small animal, he could keep him in a cage and lock it and then swallow the key. Kanou tormented with his own limitation.

"Kanou-san..." Ayase was completely worried now. Kanou hadn't even moved an inch from where he stood. Something must have happened. Ayase grabbed Kanou's hand softly. "What happened? Would you like to tell me?"

"... Ayase. Promise me."

"...Yes?"

"You'll stay here 24/7. Do not open the door for anybody else. Don't go to university, shopping or do any groceries. I want you to stay here until I say it's safe."

"Ka...Kanou-san..."

"I beg of you; please keep yourself safe... for the sake of you, me and our baby."

* * *

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	7. LEMONS SPECIAL CHAPPIE

Attempt: 1.

Version: lemon special.

My very first lemon ever. Please don't laugh over it. I will greatly appreciate some yummy reviews, hahahaha.

Time line: somewhere in chapter 2.

Note: I still couldn't write down the slang for 'little brother' (do you know what I mean? LOL) so please bear with me.

* * *

"He was right… your chest is swollen now…" Kanou grasped both of Ayase's almost—flat—but—if—you—see—closely—there—is—a—bulge—over—there. "Almost like an A-cup." He smiled, while still busy teasing the pink perky nipples.

"Unh! Unh! Ka…Ah!" Ayase blushed furiously. Kanou's talented and experienced tongue is busy licking and tasting his nipple buds. The sensation filled his chest; straight to his head and rushed down to the groin. Ayase couldn't help but grasped when Kanou suddenly bite his nipple softly.

"It's not only my imagination. In months you will feed our baby with these."

"Kanou…san! Ahhh!"

"What? Almost come? I only played with your nipple." Kanou chuckled, enjoying the amusing view in front of him. Ayase was blushing furiously; body trembling while hips seductively perked up.

"You want me, hmmm?"

Ayase couldn't answer properly. His stomach was contracting but giving such a good sensation. He could feel his groin started to leak out some pure sex liquid. Why is Kanou-san always talked dirty when they are making out? Ayase couldn't stay calm whenever he heard (and actually imagined) the dirty suggestions Kanou made. He could feel the usual sensation when he was being thrust over and over again. The gradual rush filled his body. His sphincter muscles contracted as if he was receiving the man's huge 'little brother'.

"unnn…"

Happy when he heard the moan, Kanou continued to harass the poor pinkish nipples by his hands while his mouth busy licking Ayase's belly button. Those hands skilfully pinned the sensitive buttons on Ayase's chest and puled it harder than it should. Ayase felt pain stung from his nipple but he felt like he needs more. He perked, moaned and inaudibly begged for more (Ayase wouldn't admit he needed more, even if he must die).

Kanou smiled. He knows he is good at foreplay. He loves to make Ayase came twice before he thrust his in (and make Ayase come in another 3 times or so). But today is special. Ayase is having his baby~. Kanou sung in his mind. Ayase is having my baby so he needs to give him a little 'extra-ultra-special' treatment today.

And the skin never felt softer. Kanou licked his lover's belly. Ayase's sensual voice could be heard.

"Ah!"

He licked again.

"Ahhh~!"

It's fun. Kanou smirked. He smooched over Ayase's abdomen.

"Nhhh~! Nhhh… Ahh…"

Kanou couldn't help it anymore. He kissed the tip of Ayase' tiny 'weenie'. It wobbled and shoots some whitish liquid out immediately.

"What? You came? So fast." Kanou smiled. "you really have no perseverance, Ayase."

"Kanou…san… stop… I…"

"Really? You want me to stop?"

Kanou waited while pushing one finger into Ayase's twitching bottom hole. Ayase perked up; his body tense, but Kanou persistently pushing his middle finger in as deep as he could. When he found the little lovely bump, he pushed it without mercy.

"Ah…ngg… ah… AH~!" Ayase trembled, due to the wonderful yet embarrassing sensation from the pressure to his prostate gland. Kanou's finger scratched the bump and Ayase felt blissful heaven… the sensation send straight to his spine leaving him no mercy but to shoot up again.

"You came twice. My, sensitive today, aren't you?" Kanou smiled. "Now it's my turn to feel good."

"Ka…Ah…Kanou…san…"

"Yes?"

"Fill me… insi..de…" Ayase tear glands produce the usual crystal liquid, filling his blue orb with pure seduction. Pregnant or not, Ayase is now really in need of Kanou's flesh inside him. Kanou's blood rushed straight up. His monstrous 'friend' tilted up, ready to be stimulated further.

"If that what you wished, Ayase." Kanou groaned, "I will do it. But I need to prepare you first. It's only one finger now."

"…But I need… you… hurry…"

Oh, the seductive inquiries. Kanou clamped his mouth over Ayase's delicate wet 'pee-pee' and sucked it dry. Ayase couldn't breathe from the sudden sensation. His whole body tensed, and Kanou used the chance to put three fingers in.

"Ahhh~!"

The fingers scissored inside his body. They touched everywhere, reaching the deepest they could reach. The sensation was pure torture and ecstasy. Ayase couldn't breathe properly. "No~! Nn… Kano…u-san, AH!"

"It's almost done. You're here… is so…soft." Kanou forced himself to wait. He wouldn't force Ayase's body to receive him tonight. He needs to make it ready ad begged him today. After all, that's the whole point of the special service for Ayase.

"I am …re..ready, so…"

"No. You haven't."

Kanou slipped out his fingers and immediately pulled in his tongue. Ayase's taste filled his mouth.

"Kanou—san~! Ah~! N..nno! It's dirty… Ah~!"

Ayase is never dirty for him. He knows that nowadays Ayase really washed his bottom perfectly clean to prepare himself from Kanou's attack. Although Ayase doesn't really approved being licked in the arse, he wouldn't want to present a dirty ass for Kanou. And Kanou felt rather thankful of that, although he doesn't really care since its Ayase's anyway.

It made Kanou wondered how on earth he is now happily licked some other guy's ass. But it's Ayase. And Ayase is not a guy… well, partly.

The hole twitched. It was wet from Kanou's saliva. Kanou smiled. He took some lube from the drawer, pressed some amount on top of his palm and rubbed it onto his bulging equipment. He then pressed the tube into Ayase's reddish ready hole, and squeezed the rest of the gel.

"Ah!"

"Sorry. Is it cold?"

"uhn." Ayase nodded.

"Then I will warm it now." Kanou smiled. "ready… to receive me?"

Ayase looked up, straight to the man on top of him. Those dark eyes and masculine face filled his vision. He couldn't see anything else. Yes, he is ready.

Ayase nodded. Face blushing, eyes watery, hands sticked out to hang on Kanou's back trapezius muscle. Kanou was amused for a sec.

Ayase looked totally beautiful.

He trusted his equipment in. but it slides out and ended up rubbing Ayase's small thing. Ayase winced.

"Ayase, relax."

"Ye..yes."

"Here I go."

Kanou trusted once more, and now, it successfully entered the heaven hole in one thrust. Ayase swallowed the whole length in one go.

The pain struck him raw. Ayase never know why God is so unfair and giving him so little size while Kanou san have fifth time of his. And he was the one receiving such a big longitudinal thing. But he always forgot it the next minute since the friction of such thick equipment with his arse wall is blissfully wonderful. And the length reached his deepest place; making him needs to come just by one thrust.

"Ayase….Ayase…" Kanou kept calling his name. Ayase opened his eyes and see the huge rough man on top of him rocking back and forward. Kanou looked like he is enjoying this and … somehow that's all that matter.

His stomach twitched. Ayase spontaneously touched his abdomen. He then remembered his current condition. "Kanou san! Slow…ly… The baby…"

"Aya…ah." Kanou stopped thrusting into Ayase, leaving his equipment still hard inside the flesh connection area. "Sorry. I couldn't control myself."

"It's fine… just be more gentle."

Ayase's smile produced unwanted reaction. Kanou pulled him up and made Ayase sit on top of him while they were still connected. Ayase could feel the thick thing sticked up deeper into his body.

"Ah!"

"now, you move. You can control the pace as you like." Kanou smirked. "you know better than me."

"But…" Ayase blushed. He wriggled, but that produced unnecessary movement and more sensation. "nnnh! Ah, Kanou-san…"

"come on, you can do it."

Ayase nodded, blushing, but he knows he need to move to satisfy this man so this embarrassing act will finish earlier. So he started to move. And the wonderful sensation filled his gut. He couldn't take it and come on Kanou's chest.

"No…more…" Ayase's breathing were hard and tired. Kanou smiled and kissed him deeply. "I'll move it for you then."

Kanou continued to pulled and pushed Ayase's body up and down. Ayase surrendered to his partner and in no time, he could feel Kanou came inside him. Kanou cam while shouted Ayase's name ("Yukiya!") and came and came, not stopping for a good 2 minutes.

"Ah… that was good." Kanou pecked Ayase's cheek. "I would like more."

"No! NNH!" Ayase could feel the limp thing inside him went harder again. "I am tired, now… please let me sleep."

"come on, Ayase… I need more."

"But the baby!"

"It will be fine. Trust me." Kanou smiled and licked Ayase's earlobe, tried to seduce Ayase into the mood. "come on."

"No!"

"Ayase…" Kanou whispered seductively on Ayase's ear. "I love you."

Ayase blushed and he surrendered again. "Fine…"

And the have 3 more rounds after that. Ayase cried and cried but the sensation just wont leave him alone. When they finished; Ayase was covered by liquids of various sources and body weak with no strength. He wondered whether he could walk tomorrow (actually it's already dawn) or not.

But when he looked at the peacefully sleeping Kanou beside him, he suddenly didn't care that much.

As long as they are always like this, then it's ok.

* * *

THIS HAS NO CONNECTION WITH THE STORY SO FAR. I JUST WANT TO TRY TO WRITE THE LEMONS. AND PLEASE REVIEW. HOHOHOHO... (LAUGH SCARILY AND RUN TO THE BACK OF THE SOFA). XD


	8. Chapter 7 Maybe, Maybe

This has no connection with the real OgN story. Miya is my own OC. i just tried to make it go along with the manga timeline. please bear with me. ENJOY~!

Thank you for my dear beta reader Twelf Bell san! I am doing some editing here. they changed the format...

* * *

Kanou stayed late in his study with eyebrows tied together; lines appeared on his forehead and his mouth was in a frown. He looked really scary and beast-like. The laptop was brutally used and the phone never stopped receiving abusive shoutings.

"What do you mean by 'you can't help it'?" Kanou shouted into the phone. "Don't forget our deal... What? Nothing is effective against them? _SHIT!_ You bastard…"

The phone line hung up.

Kanou spit into the bin. He had been calling more than 12 top security agents in Tokyo but all of them declined once he said his mother's name. He had been trying to ask for some additional security services but without success. His mother was what you would call an anaconda… she's deadly, fast and cunning in every way. She'd get what she want and won't ever stop before achieving them. She's infamous for her dangerous moves and people generally think five times before crossing her.

Kanou banged the table. His computer had been hacked by some crackers. Gion was called and he tried to save all the data he had before being hacked. Kanou knew straight away that those were his mother's order. She had connections everywhere, while most based in the USA.

His dad was so stupid, Kanou hissed, because he had made him with this crazy bitch. His dad was one of the dominating hands in Japanese's black market but his mother was worst; Kanou never asked and never wanted to know how they met. The only thing he cared now was how to keep Ayase safe and if possible, survive without accepting the offer.

"…Kanou-san?"

Kanou was shocked a bit, and then found a worried Ayase beside him with a glass of black coffee. Ayase put the coffee on the table carefully. "Please don't overwork yourself."

"I wouldn't need to if you promise me to stay at home."

"But… I still need to go to university and do the groceries…"

"Can't you just stay at home and be a good wife? What's wrong with that?" Kanou shouted, venturing his anger on Ayase. Ayase gulped and clutched his body. "Haven't I provided everything… oh; SH*T! I don't mean this. I'm a bit tense right now and I want to be alone. You go to sleep first."

"Kano…"

"Shut up, for now. I'm in no mood to talk with you."

Ayase flinched and felt his chest hurt. He slowly retreated from the study room and closed the door behind him. That was the first time Kanou had ever told him that he was in no mood looking at Ayase. They had quarrelled before, with Kanou forcing him to stay at home 24/7 while he stayed to defend his desire to live normally. He needed to go to university; he needed to do groceries and do all the normal stuff he usually did. Otherwise, he would turn crazy. He hadn't fully received the fact that he was carrying another life in his stomach; he needed to do the normal to confirm that he still was 'normal'. He was a man all his life and now, some random doctor had told him that he's a woman with a vestigial organ, a life to nurture with a 42% possibility of failure to live after giving birth. He didn't know what a caesarean was and it freaked him out. Searching on the internet earlier this afternoon didn't helped much either. Uni was the last thread he could hold onto. He was on the verge of a break down and Kanou was no help; he felt defeated and weak against his tears, so he gave in.

That night, they ate their dinner in silence, and Ayase could feel that Kanou's mind was elsewhere with all those furrows on his forehead.

Kanou-san didn't give him a chance to say sorry.

Suddenly, he felt nauseated. He went to the bathroom and vomited the dinner and lunch he had today. He couldn't stop; he felt like he needed to vomit out everything he had in his stomach. The awful feeling of nausea filled his throat. It was painful and his stomach contracted. Was it the baby? Ayase became scared and tried to make sure his abdomen was still fine. He didn't know what to do. He was worried about the baby. What was happening?

He felt tears rush down his cheeks as the sticky salivated bolus came out from his throat. He didn't like all this. He needed to return back to normal. It was the only thing he could depend on now. Being sold and kept to pay the debt; living and sleeping together with a beast-like man like Kanou; became his mistress… and now, pregnant with his baby… Ayase just couldn't stand it.

All he wanted now was to just sleep. He loved the bed he shared with Kanou-san. He liked the warmth of another human and the safe feelings he had whenever they shared the place. But he doubted he would feel safe tonight. Ayase walked slowly, trying to suppress the dizziness from having vomiting too much, and headed for the bedroom. He felt weak.

That was the first time he had become a target of Kanou's stress.

* * *

Kanou couldn't relax. He had given up in searching for security utility. He would have to depend solely on his subordinate and the usual system. Gion had called him and reported that the data was safe – only 1% of it got deleted and nothing important was lost. He sighed. He couldn't forgive himself for being harsh to Ayase a while ago. He could remember the way Ayase looked when he asked him to shut up.

He just couldn't help it. He had always lost his temper when dealing with either Ayase or Miya. And now, he must deal with both at the same time. It was too much for him. He closed his eyes and those childhood memories came back.

It was a nightmare.

Nothing was normal about his childhood. That was expected from a guy who knew what exactly sex was when he was just 6 years old. He spent a good 5 years with his mother before his dad found him. And those five years… nothing can return the innocence he once had.

Kanou smiled bitterly. Thinking about it, he was such an innocent child before. He was a wild child; he played with guns and knives before he even learned to talk. His dad was the reason, being the cold and harsh parent with 'no pain no gain' motto. But he was never unhappy. At least his life was filled with adrenaline and good, useful things like business tactics, self defence and stock manipulation lessons. He had Someya to quarrel with and his dad's friends (other members of the infamous four) kinda spoiled him. But after he was kidnapped—well, not exactly kidnapped since it was his own mother who took him away—to the USA when he was 7, the world never looked the same again. In a way, it was thanks to his mother that Kanou now knew how harsh the world was – harsher than what he knew from his father.

He still remembered every detail about his years in his mother's den. Filled with violence and dirty money; he was actually quite enjoying it until he knew drugs. Drugs turned friends into enemies, brothers to rivals and angels to killers. Even the woman who took care of him inside the syndicate's household was killed by some random friends he made just because of a drug bribe.

His mother kidnapped him not for romantic purposes (such as missing him or loving him) but just because she needed a name as an heir before he could take over his dad's place as the syndicate's highest boss. He was trained hard and trialled cruelly to make sure that he was a perfect heir for the group. He had faced many attempts of assassinations and survived. He was the main target as many tried to prevent Miya from taking over the syndicate. There were some internal disagreements too. Miya didn't care about Kanou, she expected him to take care of himself and succeed in it as the heir. The fear and memories made him give up trusting others until the day he met Ayase.

He couldn't smile and contradict his mother. She had firmly planted the conditions to never ever go against her, in his mind. His father tried to free him and he was killed in process. Kanou ran away on that rainy day, felt the lowest and the weakest when he met Ayase smiling to him while offering him a kindness he never knew. A pure, unselfish kindness to offer a stranger an umbrella to share. The kindness of providing him a place to stay from the pouring rain. A place filled with warmth and feelings he never had received before from either of his parents. The thing he never found anywhere else. All were given to him by a petite stranger with golden hair and the prettiest blue eyes.

Ayase was the reason he could smile today, and now… he blamed everything on Ayase's wish to maintain a normal life. He felt low. He shouldn't have done any of this. He should have just given up on Ayase. It would have done good for both of them; Ayase being saved and debt free while he returned as the fearless and notorious financial company-owner. He should have just returned Ayase to the normal world he knew and adored.

Kanou bit his lip. He couldn't stand the thought of losing Ayase. But if that meant that Ayase would be safe… then… maybe…

He just needed to let go.

Since he was going to let go… how about one last kiss?

* * *

He opened the door softly. The room was dark; he could hear Ayase's soft breathing. Kanou found himself smiling in the dark. He was happy that he could return to the room where Ayase was and felt like it was normal. He had been dreaming of having Ayase inside his home; and he got that chance when he saw the debt of Ishii Tetsuo; Ayase's shitty cousin. He had tried his best and succeeded in getting Ayase, making him stay, and saving him in various situations… and now, he must let go?

Don't kid me.

Kanou was getting more irritated by the passing minutes; he closed the door and changed his clothes before sitting beside his lover. Ayase's slender body was so frail. Like the first time he held Ayase, he still felt like Ayase would break if he held him too tight. The small creature breathed slowly. Kanou couldn't see how pale Ayase was in the dark room.

Ayase had gone to sleep after forcing himself to take 3 pills of pain killers in one go. His body felt weak and his stomach felt restless. He knew he needed to call Someya-san or Kudo-san tomorrow. When his head touched the pillow, he couldn't help but fall straight into a deep, blank rest.

"…se."

Ayase felt he was being touched by someone. The big and callous hands were touching his cheek softly. And started going down… it felt ticklish but comfortable. Since he had no energy to look up and see who was there, he gave up and stayed asleep.

"…se."

_Who…?_ "Ka…nou-sa…n…"

"Ayase…" And that voice trailed off. He could feel the usual lips touching his. Ayase flinched before receiving the aggressive invader tongue. _Who was that…? Oh…_

"Ka…ah…" Ayase moaned softly when Kanou licked his neckline softly. It had been Kanou-san all along. Ayase was already used to the habits of Kanou attacking him in bed while he was in a deep sleep. Usually, he felt irritated because Kanou was disturbing his sleep, but now he felt relieved. Things had returned to normal. Kanou-san had already returned normal and now, he just needed to apologize.

"Kano…u…san… so…rry…"

"Ayase… I'm sorry too."

Kanou sounded so soft and sad when he said that. Ayase's eyes snapped open and found Kanou's face in front of his chest, enjoying his nipples. Ayase chuckled from the ticklish sensation before accepting the gradual warmth and desire.

"Can I… go all the way?"

It was weird of Kanou to ask him before they made love. Kanou had never asked him for his consent; everything was done based on Kanou's needs. The question made Ayase feel … more treasured. Was it because he was carrying Kanou's child? Why did it all return back to the pregnancy? He couldn't lie to himself that he didn't like the sensation he was feeling. He was used to it and had began to crave for it. Although his whole body was still weak and although he knew that the sensation wasn't good for the baby, Ayase felt the gradual fire enveloping him take over his common sense.

Now Ayase had one more reason to force himself to accept the abnormal reality he was in.

"Ayase…?" Kanou was waiting for Ayase's answer. He never knew he could wait like this. But now, he was ready to pound over his lover as tender as he could if he gave the magic word, or just finish in the bathroom by himself.

"…yes." Ayase softly answered, hugging Kanou's head tightly. "Please… be gentle with me."

And the night never felt that long before.

* * *

ARGH!

Please review?

Please Favorite?

Thank you for reading. This is the longest story i have made so far. thinking of ending it somewhere...next ten chapters? LOL


	9. Chapter 8 Helplesness

This chapt is long. I will take a break after this. And I edit some of it.

:) thank you and enjoy!

* * *

Kanou stared softly at the petite little creature inside his arms. Ayase hadn't woke up yet; clearly due to fatigue and tiredness from the night before. Kanou was not as satisfied as he used to be after their love making; he tried to be as gentle and tender as possible, and they only did it once. It was unusual, since Kanou usually had to come a minimum of two times, while Ayase—well, came at least five. Ayase had asked him to stop when they finished the first session. Kanou had sensed that the golden haired boy was very weak; even his grasp on Kanou's neck last night was unusually feeble. But Kanou felt content. He felt filled; perfect and whole. He could feel that they actually had a bond and maybe the same love for each other. He didn't mind being unsatisfied if he could just feel this feeling every day…

_Is this happiness?_

Ayase wiggled in his dream. _So… cute._ Kanou stopped himself from a generous bleeding nose and from kissing Ayase. But a minute later, he was shocked.

Ayase vomited on his chest.

Lost in words, Kanou could see how in pain Ayase really was and silently received the vomit from his lover's mouth. _What the hell?_ Ayase continued to pour everything out and then choked himself. Ayase was fully awake now, and when he gradually stopped, he looked up to see the place he had been vomiting on. His eyes became larger out of guilt.

"K-Kanou-san… I'm sorry! I'll clean you immediately…urg…"

"…It's fine…" Kanou couldn't help it. He was in a state he never knew he would have to experience before. He was being vomited on by a guy on a bed. How comical. And honestly, he didn't even feel angry. All he felt now were surprise and worry. He didn't care about his soiled pyjamas. "Are you okay yourself?"

"I… I'm fine. It's just… I feel nauseated…" Ayase smiled, and tried to wake up and search for a towel to wipe Kanou's wet and dirty chest. But instead of waking up, he stumbled down onto the bed like had no energy. And it was then that Kanou realized how pale his lover's face was.

"I'll go. You stay here."

Kanou quickly stood up and went to the bathroom. He took some towels, simultaneously wiping his chest while pulling off his pants. After he changed, he took some other towels and sheets into the room.

"I'll take care of this. You stay resting."

"Thank…you." Ayase couldn't bring himself to smile. He felt really weak. His body didn't listen to his brain. His stomach unusually hurt and it felt like every cell in his body were moving, changing.

"Sorry." Kanou pulled Ayase gently and carried him bridal style to the sofa. "You stay here while I make the bed." He then gently tucked Ayase into a thick blanket and went inside the room to clean the mess.

Ayase felt thankful. He knew it should be his responsibility to clean since it was his mess but now he didn't think he could even walk. Everything felt heavy, and the nausea came alternatively with stomach pain. His abdomen moved by itself. It felt like he was changing into something he didn't want to be. _Is the baby changing shape? _

Kanou was busy changing the sheet. His mind was somewhere else. _What is happening with Ayase? Is it normal to have these kinds of symptoms in pregnancy?_ The more he thought about it, the more restless Kanou became. In the end, he realized he was just afraid of one thing: what if he was the one who had made Ayase so weak? What if their love making was the reason Ayase couldn't even walk this morning? This was different from the usual 'couldn't-walk' reasons. Usually Ayase still had the energy to pout or be angry at him. But now…

He should call Someya.

* * *

Ayase was now safely tucked inside the blanket on the bed. Kanou had given him his almost edible porridge and some painkillers. While he was deep in sleep, Kanou tried to decide between leaving the mother of his child alone or to stay home today.

The door bell rings, waking Ayase from his slumber and Kanou from his deep thinking.

"The door…"

"I'll get it."

Kanou went to the front door; he looked from the peeking space and saw that nobody was there. But there was a package under the door. Kanou made sure it was safe before he opened the door and retrieved the package.

It was a small box; 40x40x4 cm3, and it was wrapped nicely with a brown band. Kanou searched for the address of its sender but finding nothing in the end, he opened the package.

Inside, he found a slashed little finger, fresh with blood and the nail, wrapped by green shredded papers.

A note peeked through from the package.

_Just a reminder for tomorrow. Just say yes. This is a little present from me. Your security guards were useless. I advise you to change them. Mom. _

Kanou shuddered. It was just like his mother's style. She was a crazy woman. Kanou was sure that his apartment security guard had gone to hell. Kanou was honestly relieved it was him who opened the package. If Ayase found this, he was sure the blond boy would be shocked to death.

He threw the package away into the bin and went back to the room.

"Who was that?" Ayase asked weakly.

"No, nothing. Just a prank."

Ayase felt strange. _How come there's a prank in a secured pentagon like this?_ Moreover, Kanou's security guard down at the lobby wouldn't let these kind of things to pass. But Kanou looked like he didn't want to be asked any further so Ayase kept quiet.

Kanou stared at the floor. _Shit!_ This had reminded him of how dangerous his mother could be. He had been left with no options but to accept the offer. But the offer was so dangerous. He knew people would try to sabotage the process; some other group will try to eliminate him for the sake of the agreement and the police will try to catch his ass… not to mention, his rival will have a chance to use some loop hole to trip him. Although the money was a real deal (13% of the whole sum? That's approximately more than 10 billion yen and no tax either since its illegal) but he just couldn't make Ayase take the risk with him. And now, Ayase was so weak… just a little shock could make him go crazy, or worse... die. Kanou was sure Ayase would break down if he saw the pinky finger in the package.

God, what should he do?

The bell rung again. Kanou felt his body tense up. He walked out and found the stupid couple at his door. He was relieved for a second.

Someya and Kudo looked at him and smiled. "Good morning."

"You're late. You should have came 5 minutes after I called you."

Someya puffed her cheek when she heard the grumble. "Come on, danna-sama, don't make such an impossible inquiry! I've brought Kudo with me, he knows about Ayase more than me… Where is the poor boy?"

"He's on the bed. He's weak and he can't rise from the bed."

Kudo looked alarmed and ran past Kanou quickly. Someya closed the door while Kanou went to chase the professional pervert. But it seemed like Kudo could be trusted. He was busy checking Ayase's wrist for a heartbeat count when they both arrived.

"You…"

"Wait! Let me check him first and have you yell at me later." Kudo sounded serious. He checked Ayase's temperature, and then lifted the blanket to spread Ayase's legs. He looked at Kanou. "Could you please leave the room? I need to conduct a privacy check here."

"You..!" Kanou wasn't ready to leave but Someya pulled him out. "Trust me, danna-sama. Kudo may be a pervert but he is a professional too. He knows what he's doing."

Kanou cursed under his breath and went to wait in the living room while Someya made some tea in the kitchen.

"AH!" suddenly, Ayase's voice filled the air. He sounded like he was in pain. Kanou stood up and was about ready to pounce at the closed door when Someya pulled him back. "Wait, danna-sama. He's just checking. That's what they do – they need to insert their finger to check whether the uterus is fine."

"Uterus?" Kanou asked, and suddenly, he realized what Someya meant. "You mean he's sticking his finger into Ayase's ass?"

"Well, yes. Usually it's the vagina, but since your wife isn't normal, then…"

"Let me in, Someya. I don't trust–"

"I'm finished." Kudo came out from the room and pulled off the disposable gloves he wore. It was smeared with blood. "Relax, I have done nothing to your wife."

"Why should I believe you?" Kanou was ready to roar.

"Because you're the one who made him like that, Kanou."

"…" Kanou became silent and sat back down. Kudo sat in front of him, looking all serious. "I am glad to say that nothing serious happened. The embryo is still inside, safely. I was prepared for the worst when you said he couldn't wake up from bed. You know, maybe this is repetitive, but his body is under no conditions to bear a baby. He might be XXY, yes, but the organ isn't as developed as a normal female's and the walls are thinner. You've pushed his body to copulate against its will and now, it has taken a toll in his internal organ. Since it's not a perfect organ, the baby's bump may burst if you put too much pressure. Although the placenta is fine, as I believed from the check up yesterday, its mother isn't fine. Now, hormone imbalance is taking place. Ayase's body is being attacked by the baby's hormone secretion. To make it simpler, his female and male hormones are going against each other and that's why he is currently so weak. I don't have the equipment to check about the possibility of blood poisoning from the baby, too. He has a less immune system now, so please don't let him catch a cold or the flu. He might die from it, I'm afraid. His body is still trying to adapt to the abnormal condition. Please don't force him to do anything vigorous… for example, what you did last night."

"How…" Kanou blushed a bit. How did this bastard know about what he had done last night?

"I found your semen inside his rectum. Or maybe we should call it his vagina now. Well, I'll give him some painkillers for the hormones and please give him plenty of hot water as well as feed him iron and calcium source of diets; he needs that now since his own body can't produce sufficient amount. May I ask how old actually Ayase-san is?"

"... Almost 19." Kanou reluctantly answered, since many people had already branded him a lolicon when they heard how old Ayase was.

"My! A teenage pregnancy! How romantic!" Kudo smiled gleefully. He was hit by Kanou's strong blow a second later. "Sorry." Kudo sniffled between the pain. "I suggest you send him to the hospital where we could take better care of him. Staying at home is good, I understand, since the mother will be at ease in his usual environment. But being in a hospital with people taking care of him is safer. I hope you understand and yeah... I just want to ask you, what happened with the security guard on the lobby? It's unusual you have nobody there."

Kanou sighed. Everything was so messy. So he was right. His fear came true. He was the reason Ayase became so weak. Now he must put Ayase in danger of childbirth and torture.

_God, I'm so weak. _

"Don't be so panicked, danna-sama." Someya smiled, patting her childhood friend's hair. "We'll help you through this."

* * *

please review ( as usual)?

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Thank you!


	10. Chapter 9 Resolution

Thank you for Twelf Bell for betaing this~! sorry for my whims and unsteady pace :)

Enjoy!

* * *

Someya sensed immediately that something was wrong with her danna-sama. She saw him hunched on the sofa; he refused to talk to her and he kept staring blankly at the tea on the table. Kanou looked like he was trying to work out his mind over something very crucial and dangerous. It was this habit of his that made problems seem harder since he was not one to share them.

She knew it would be hard to make Kanou open his mouth, so all she did was prepare some porridge in the kitchen for Ayase. The poor creature was sleeping inside the room; nobody dared to disturb him. Suddenly, two arms hugged her waist tightly. "Stop thinking about that other man when I am present."

"Kudo!"

"Call me Hattori, Kaoruko. Don't you think it's appropriate since we're already an item?"

"I beg your pardon but who and who are an item?" Someya blushed, but she desperately tried to free herself from the man's grip. Kudo smiled.

"Of course: you and me. How many years do you think I have spent on just thinking of you? You're the perfect bride for me, Kaoru. Please marry me."

"I don't want such a half-assed proposal. We are in somebody else's kitchen, for goodness sake!"

"But you never listen..."

"Of course I never listen! Every time I turn my back on you, you always go and flirt with other women."  
"Jealous?"

"No. I just thought that if you like females so much, why do you keep... chasing me?" Someya sighed. "Do you think a transgender like me wouldn't feel hurt just because of the 'I-don't-cheat-on-you-because-I-am-not-sleeping-with-any-other-man' reason?"

"I... know that was my fault, but I just couldn't take it. You're the prettiest ever, Kaoru. My prettiest flower."

Kudo smooched his ex-lover's cheek. Someya turned her head and her massive black hair smacked Kudo on the face.

"Stop disturbing me." She turned off the electric stove. "Pass me the bowl."

"I got it." Kudo smiled weirdly. "Don't worry, I'll pass it to you."

"Hey... what happened?" Someya was getting suspicious. This man was trying to get her away from the bin. "What are you hiding there?"

"Oh, nothing... it was just a package..."

Someya harshly pushed Kudo aside and looked inside the bin. Inside was an opened box with a bloody little finger.

She screamed at the top of her lungs.

"Explain what that was." Someya was clutching Kudo's shirt tightly, but stared with heavy intensity at Kanou. Kanou sighed. It was clear she was shocked and scared but determined to know what was going on. And Kanou didn't like the curious Someya.

"Didn't you ever learn on not opening other peoples' house bins?"

"I have never found a finger inside!"

"It was just a reminder from someone. I'm fine."

"I don't care about you! What if Ayase found it? What reminder? From who?"

"Shut up. I'm not in the mood for talking."

"Kanou, I am concerned about you and Ayase. I know you have some trouble... and I don't want Ayase to fall into any dangerous situations as well. Please tell me... wait, don't tell me... it's from... Miya?"

Someya found the answer herself. Shocked, she closed her mouth with her hand. She was pale now and Kudo needed to support her before she collapsed onto the floor. "She's really back? Was she searching for you again?"

"Better still. She wanted to drag me into the drug business." Kanou sighed. "That's why I couldn't tell you. You'll just get yourself messed up in this. This doesn't concern you. Just forget it."

"This _does_ concern me." Kudo suddenly spoke. "I am your wife's pediatrician. I'm responsible for his health. I don't want any bad thing to ruin my reputation. And well, as a friend, I think we could help you a bit, Kanou."

Kanou scratched his head. "You guys are annoying. Yes; she asked me to join her group. And she threatened me with Ayase's safety. That's why I don't want to bring him to the hospital."

"But he's so weak..."

"I may not be as weak as you think... I think." A small weak voice came from the bedroom. The three people looked back and saw Ayase walking slowly from the open bedroom door. "Can I listen too? I... don't want to be kept in the dark anymore."

"Ayase!" Someya briefly embraced the weak boy and helped him to get a seat on the sofa. Kanou walked towards him and kneeled near Ayase's feet. He stared at the large blue orbs in front of him.

"Are you sure? This is harder and harsher than what you might think... This is far more dangerous than the usual criminals we have, you know."

"I'll be fine, Kanou-san." Ayase smiled. "I'm feeling better already and I don't want to stay alone in that room while you're in trouble. Please, at least let me know and judge myself. Who knows... I might be able to help you." He gently cupped Kanou's face and their foreheads met. The warmth spread around the skin contact area.

"Don't you believe me?"

The final question was asked by Ayase. Kanou couldn't say no. In the end, he nodded.

"I'll tell you then. This woman... code-named Miya... she's my mother."

"Mother? Kanou-san, you have a mother?" Ayase was rather shocked to hear the truth.

"Of course I do. Where do you think I came from? An egg?"

"No... I mean..." Ayase laughed softly. Kanou, upon seeing Ayase's laugh, sighed back and put his head on top of Ayase's thighs.

"It's fine. You know how my dad was an underground evil businessman right? Well, my mother is 3 times more dangerous than him and 10 times more devilish than he was. She wasn't even human to start with. She's a drug dealer mogul's unofficial offspring from one of his mistresses, but she was the most identical to him. Well, she single handedly rose up to the head post like how she is today. Now, she mainly deals in drugs around the Middle East and Japan. She was here and asked me to do some of her usual dirty jobs. And I said no."

"Why?" Ayase asked innocently. Kanou smiled. He just couldn't get angry at Ayase's innocence.

"Because it means I will have to put your life in danger. It's not a normal job, Ayase. It's a dirty job of laundering money and it automatically makes you the enemy of cops, the country and many others underground organizations. I couldn't bear to put you in such a risk. Not to mention we are having a child."

"I am fine, so... "

"'I am fine' your ass! Who was practically vomiting and so weak that he couldn't move, huh? You don't understand anything. Even I would succumb to their method of torture. She threatened me with you. And I must give her a 'yes' tomorrow afternoon."

"... Kanou san..." Ayase looked at the huge beast in front of him in a soft manner. "Be honest with me. Am I a burden?"

"Of course not!"

"Then... do you want or not want to take the job?"

"..." Kanou looked down at the floor. "If I didn't have you, I would take the risk since it is nice money, but now..."

"I'm not a burden to you; didn't you say that?"

"Yeah, sure. But..."

"Then I won't be a burden. Just take the job. I'm sorry that I have been such an intolerant person. I don't need to go to university anymore, if it can give you some relief. Now that I know the reason, I understand that my will to go to uni is dangerous and that not going is for my own good. Thank you for being such a considerate man. I will take care of myself, so please... do what you think is right, Kanou-san."

Someya was moved to tears. This little creature had Kanou kneeled on the floor, who meekly put his head on his warm embrace and now... Ayase really sounded like a martyr. Kanou was silent, but the next moment, he hugged Ayase's waist so tight that Kudo couldn't help but remind Kanou that he wasn't supposed to place any great pressure on Ayase's frail abdomen.

But Kanou was reluctant to let go. And Ayase just smiled as he reassured Kudo-san that he was fine.

* * *

Kanou hugged Ayase tightly.

"Kanou-san! Please... let me go!"

"Just let me do this. I just want to make sure you are safe here in my arms." Kanou unconsciously answered. Kuba (older), who was driving, heard the statement and blushed. Was he hearing things wrong? That monster boss of his wants to cuddle? But Kuba (older) sensed something was off. Yesterday, his boss was so easily agitated especially after the visit of the strange charismatic woman. And Kanou couldn't stop banging the desk (good thing they had changed the desk with real and strong mahogany, otherwise it would break each time Kanou was angry and banged the table) and he called a lot of security companies.

Today, they were heading to the Hilton Hotel of Tokyo. Kuba (older) didn't know what was actually happening, but he knew that they were meeting the woman with the same smile as his boss.

Kuba (older) guessed that maybe... the woman was his boss' relative or something. But she was dangerous for sure, since Kanou reminded him to take double the amount of normally used weapons. He just couldn't wait to see what was actually happening. And he was quite tortured to hear the sensual sounds of Ayase from behind his seat.

* * *

HOW IS IT?

PLEASE REVIEW?

PLEASE FAVORITE?

NEXT CHAPTER IS THE MEETING BETWEEN MOTHER AND SON~ ! PLEASE LOOK FOWARD FOR IT!


	11. Chapter 10

Thank you for my dear beta Twelf Bell san!Sorry for being such a burdensome betead? hahaha.

This is combination from the (actual) chapt 10 and 11. Honestly I was sad because the last chapter wasnt getting much response like usual; but ma ii ka~!

Enjoy!

* * *

"Ayase..." Kanou whispered slowly in Ayase's ear. They were walking into the lion's den – the so-called Miya-san's suite in the hotel; the guards were expecting them. Kanou grabbed Ayase's body possessively, refusing to let go even when they were being checked. They entered the lift with Kuba (older) and two of Miya's bodyguards.

"Ngh?" Ayase asked softly. Kanou had been so gentle last night. After Someya and Kudo went back home, Kanou had volunteered to sleep on the sofa and had given up the bed for Ayase. Ayase was reluctant at first and said it was fine for him to share the bed since he felt better, but Kanou refused the offer. Kanou knew that he wouldn't have the ability to restrain himself to not attack Ayase when they had just a 10 cm distance between them.

Kanou was busy thinking while 'enjoying' his Ayase-less night on the sofa. He had decided to receive the offer. He was thinking on _how_ he should receive the offer. He promised to himself that he would never let Ayase be in pain anymore (aside from nature pain, that is). And so, he had made up his mind.

"Sorry."

"Ka...Kanou-san?!" Ayase was surprised when Kanou suddenly apologized. "Wh... Why?"

"I'm sorry I put you through all these problems."

Ayase became silent. He didn't like this. Why did dKanou san always blame himself for his pain? Ayase wasn't _that_ weak (he thinks so) and he was able to protect himself (he thinks he's quite invincible) if required. The lift door opened.

"Welcome, young master."

"Alfred."

The butler smiled while still bowing to Kanou and Ayase. He looked like he was in his mid fifties; a professional and an experienced manservant with an exquisite and immaculate suit. Greyish hair but looked manly; Alfred was the epitome of a butler.

"Please come this way."

Alfred stoically led them to the living-room suite. Ayase couldn't help but wonder how much it would cost to stay for a day. The room was more suited to be a palace than a hotel suite. They were seated on the sofa; and tea was served right away by some maids.

"Madam will arrive soon."

"Ah, I'm here. Thanks, Alfred. Please take care of the rest." A woman in her bathroom robe entered the room.

"Yes, Madam." Alfred bowed to her, more than which was required, before leaving the room.

"Everyone, leave us alone. You, stay." Miya smiled at Kuba (older) and a bodyguard of hers. "So my son won't cry in fear."

"Who will? Bitch!" Kanou hissed at her. Kuba (older) unconsciously clapped his palm. _Oh~!_ He was right all along. They were mother and son.

Ayase couldn't help but stare. The lady was beautiful. She looked like she was in her mid thirties; blond-haired and green eyed, a perfect body enveloped in bathing gown. She sat elegantly down on the sofa. She was the woman who had brought Kanou-san into this world. And then Ayase remembered.

"Ah!" He had met this lady at Kudo-san's waiting room!

"Hi, darling. I believe this is our first time meeting right?"

She cuts him off before Ayase could remind her about their last meeting. Ayase was surprised. _No way!_ Had she forgotten their first meeting already? She smiled. "Your name is Ayase... Yukiya? Are you a half (mixed blood)?"

"A... yes."

"That's why you are so cute. My my, Somuku. Why haven't you introduced your wife properly to me yet?"

"Shut up."

"I'm sad. I had been thinking of giving you some arranged marriage proposals before coming here. Never had I thought you already had someone else... Mom is so sad. I never remembered having raised you like this, all those 20 years."

"Eh?" Ayase was again, surprised. "20 years?" How come? She was so young; Kanou-san was almost thirty... what happened to the natural law of having one's mom being older?

"She's fifty this year; don't be tricked by her superficial and visible age, Ayase. She has more liposuction than I could think of; her skin is plastic, her hair is dyed, her teeth are remade from plaster and..."

"Somuku... don't you think it's unwise to insult your mother in front of her face?"

Miya-san was smiling but she had a blackish aura around her. Kanou smirked. "What? You don't like your secrets being revealed? Not like people don't know it anyway, a botox junkie like you..."

"Don't be impolite like your father, _honey_." Miya smiled while clicking her gun and aiming it at Kanou's chest. "Let's finish this disgusting family talk."

Kanou fell silent and Ayase felt his body tense. She wasn't joking with her gun. She was serious and could just pull the trigger anytime she liked without hesitating. Kanou clutched Ayase's waist closer and growled.

"No gun; that was the promise."

Miya smiled and then put the gun down on the table in front of them.

"Now, Somuku. Do you have your answer ready?"

"... With some conditions."

"... Do you understand where you stand now? What right do you think you have to give anymore conditions for me?"

"I do. You know I'm the best. I don't think you would choose me just because I'm your... family." Kanou smirked uncomfortably. "And if you want the best, you need me. So I have the right to put conditions on our pact."

"Smart boy. Fine; let me listen." Miya smiled, as if she already knew what he would say.

"3 conditions. First; I will have the 13% and the tips. You said that."

"Yes."

"Second; you will guarantee that the money is safe and not inside any government database. I hate cops trailing my ass."

"... I think I could do that. But isn't that supposed to be your job?"

Kanou sighed. He pretended not to notice the comment. "And third; I... I want you to make sure of Ayase's safety."

"Eh?"

"Please." Kanou bit his lip. "He's having my... child. If something happened to him, I will kill you myself."

"... Somuku... have you forgotten?"

Miya suddenly looked more serious than ever. She stood up and walked towards Kanou. She titled up her son's face. Kanou flinched, but stayed in contact with his mother's fingers. He just couldn't ignore his mother's orders. They were implanted inside his mind since a long time ago. He had no strength to disobey those.

"Have you forgotten the rule?"

"... No."

"Then?"

"..."

Miya sighed.

"I am your mother. I'm telling you this for your own good and _his_ own good. He's useless, weak and troublesome. I think you know that too. He's cute, yes. Adorable, yes. But weak? No power, no name? _Useless_. You can play with him as long as you like, but know your priorities, Kanou Somuku. I would not permit my son to fall in this kind of useless relationship."

"Shut up! Ayase is not useless!"

"Can't you see what's happening here? He's your weak point, Somuku. Look. I can move my hand..." and suddenly a hand slapped Ayase's face so hard that he fell from the sofa and onto the carpet. The sound echoed through the room. Ayase was dumbfounded; he had never expected to be slapped like that, and her strength was unusually strong for a woman. Kuba had began to move but was caught by Miya's bodyguard.

"... And there he is, totally weak on the carpet. A useless mistress like him should just be a companion, Somuku." Miya continued her sentence. Kanou was shocked. He knocked his mother's hand off his face and quickly helped Ayase to stand back up, but his mother took the gun from the table and aimed it at Ayase. Kanou was frozen for a sec.

"See? He's your weak point. Let him go before everything messes up. It's better for both of you. What you need is a _good_ woman with a strong family background. Not a pretty boy with no family like him. I don't care about the baby whatsoever. You can always make another one."

"You...!"

"Somuku, remember. You are my heir. You will eventually take my seat, do you hear? I didn't make you with your father just for letting you become a small business company owner. Your father was a good gene to make an offspring with. Don't disappoint me, you foolish child."

"..." Kanou was silent, but Ayase could feel Kanou's grasp on his hand become stronger which made Ayase's palm begin to hurt. Kanou looked like he was withstanding some painful feelings inside his mind. Miya continued; she either failed or maybe pretended that she didn't see her son's reactions.

"I don't care what you think, but I can't accept the third condition you requested. I don't want to sacrifice my best bodyguard for a useless thing like him. Now scram. I will send the first installment tomorrow to the usual account."

Miya threw the gun at her bodyguard, who received it spontaneously, and then she left the room. They could hear her calling the butler.

Ayase was shocked. Rather, he was insulted. How dare the lady call him useless in his face? Moreover, she thought of him as a burden for Kanou-san? And... the fact that she said he was a useless orphan...

"Don't worry about her, Ayase." Kanou whispered. "Does your cheek hurt?"

"No." Ayase was still disappointed and angry. The lady he thought was so kind that day had turned out to be a female version of Kanou-san, but even more devilish and impolite. "I am angry."

Kanou was shocked; he didn't think he would receive such an answer. From Ayase, no less. But Ayase looked determined and yes, it was the first time Kanou had ever seen Ayase getting angry.

He looked so cute that Kanou couldn't help but laugh.

"Why are you laughing?" Ayase shouted, moodily pouting. "I'm angry here!"

"Hahaha... you're really something, Ayase." Kanou chuckled. "... hhh... I think we better get back home before she throws us out."

"...Kanou-san..."

"Yes?"

"May I ask why you are so afraid of her? It's... unusual for you."

Kanou looked down at him. He smiled bitterly.

"I'll tell you tonight." Kanou sighed. But Ayase could feel that it wasn't as easy as it sounded to make Kanou tell him the real truth.

________________

When they returned home, Ayase couldn't help but worry. Kanou-san still hadn't spoken a single word yet. He was still in his thinking-deeply mode and was relaxing himself on the huge sofa. In no time, his snores vibrated throughout the room.

Ayase went to prepare dinner; he had already made up his mind to make some nice delicious dinner consisting of Kanou-san's favourite foods. He wanted to cheer the guy up. Luckily, they still had some meat left; he needed to do the groceries tomorrow, but since Kanou-san had forbidden him to leave the mansion, he reminded himself to ask later.

Ayase covered his mouth with his hand. He suddenly had this craving for pineapple. How funny was that? Pineapple, of all fruit? They had oranges, apples and grapes ready in the fridge; but Ayase wanted pineapple. Pineapple. Only that fruit would suffice his hunger.

Ayase started his scavenger hunt for made-with-pineapple products. He searched up and down, inside and outside the fridge for a good 30 minutes. But he just couldn't find any pineapple. He knew it. He had never bought any pineapple products before.

The cravings got into his head. He just couldn't continue cooking without any immediate supply of that sweet-sourish fruit in his stomach. He gathered up his courage and asked Kanou.

"Kanou-san..."

"Yes?" Kanou was still half-asleep on the sofa, oblivious of his surroundings.

"I 'm sorry to bother you... but could you... go with me to buy pineapple?"

"Huh? What?"

"Can you go with me for grocery shopping?"

"Can't you do it tomorrow? I don't mind eating anything that is left in the fridge."

"But... I want to go."

"I'm tired."

"I need pineapple."

"I'm... what? Say that again? You _need pineapple_?" Tired as he was, Kanou felt strange since it was the first time Ayase had made up his mind and didn't back out.

"Yes." Ayase nodded.

"What do you want to cook?"

"No, I just need... pineapple so badly."

"..." Kanou rocked his brain. Someya's report did say something like this.

_Fact # 31: The mother will crave for some unusual things, such as food (usually sour or sweet tasting) and things (usually colour or shape-specified) while in the pregnancy stage. This is a normal and general occurrence in pregnancy. However, please note that if the cravings go unfulfilled, the baby may be born with psychological defects; many grandmother-believed rumours say that the baby will be born with the inability of controlling its saliva productivity._

_Now, _that's _dangerous... _Kanou said to himself. Was this pineapple thingy also one of the craving symptoms? But then... he didn't want to risk the possibility of having a defect child. He decided to fulfill whatever Ayase asked now.

"OK. I'll go. You stay here. You're still weak and it's dangerous. I can do it myself. Pineapple; is that it?"

"But, Kanou-san..."

"Yes?"

"Can you do the groceries as well? I can give you the list. Here."

Kanou froze. The list Ayase held out to him was 30 cm long. He could see Ayase's neat and small handwriting filling the page. Luckily, it wasn't double sided.

"...OK."

"Thank you, Kanou-san." Ayase smiled. "You're such a great help."

Kanou swallowed hard. Ayase's smile was so radiant he almost felt blind. He took the list and went to the door. "I'll do it. I'm going now."

"Thank you!" Ayase smiled and waved. "Have a safe trip! Just call if you don't understand the list."

Kanou smirked. He? The best company owner couldn't read a grocery list? Don't joke around! He felt like he was being ridiculed by Ayase. But since it was Ayase, he didn't mind.

Suddenly Kanou felt like he was a husband losing against his wife's order.

________________

"Hello?"

"Ayase! What do you mean by softener?"

"It's the liquid chemical I use to soften the laundry... you will find it in the laundry section, Kanou-san."

"Oh."

"And please take the cotton scent. It's the usual scent that I choose."

"OK." And Kanou closed the phone.

Ayase sighed. Kanou had been calling him five times ever since he left the house. For the first one, he asked what kind of meat: chicken, lamb, beef, pork or ostrich. The second was Kanou asking him what type of pasta sauce: frozen, paste or ready make. The third one was what kind of rice: oriental, brown, organic, and how much. The forth was about vacuum bags. And now...

Ayase smiled. He couldn't help but feel funny when he imagined how dizzy Kanou-san must be inside that supermarket right now. Laughter bubbled from his insides.

Suddenly, he felt the urge to vomit again.

He ran to the bathroom and luckily arrived in time to vomit out the stuff from his mouth to the toilet basin. He felt like he had already made a good relationship with the basin in just two days. It kept coming. He just couldn't stop it. His head started to beat loudly and strongly. It felt like his heart was going to come out of his ear drum. Tears rushed out even though he wasn't crying; it was an unconscious physical response to the pressure from his head. He could feel his face burn and the uncomfortable feeling of dizziness enveloped him.

He needed some of the painkillers Kudo-san prescribed for him... but he couldn't walk properly to the medicine box. Ayase pushed himself to stand up. Dizziness took control of his body and he stumbled back down to the floor.

In the end, he crawled to the living room. Out of breath, he surrendered to the giddiness and fainted on the cold wooden floor.

__________________________

Kanou smacked his forehead. Just like his intuition; Ayase had fainted once more. When he called for the sixth time to ask about eggs, nobody had answered the phone – the house phone as well. He knew something was amiss. He had taken all the groceries he had so far and threatened queuing people in front of him with his glare. He then made his way to the front of the line and payed it all in cash.

When he reached home and opened the door, he saw Ayase's body sprawled on the cold floor. He quickly threw all the pineapples and stuff he bought, rushing to get Ayase and take him gently onto the bed.

An hour later, Kudo appeared.

"Why did you come so late!?" Kanou was ready to punch the doctor.

"I have many patients besides him, Kanou. I just couldn't make him my top priority because one other patient of mine just gave birth 20 minutes ago."

"I don't care; Ayase is more important than any of them!"

"Kanou." Suddenly Kudo sounded so cold. "I can't accept that. You know, as a professional, everybody holds the same value in my eyes. I don't want to angry you, but I am here just because Ayase-san is my patient and no less, no more. If you can't accept this fact, please ask somebody else."

Kanou sighed. "You... You're always like this whenever Someya is not around."

"You know she is special. I will give her what she asks me. Now, can I check your wife?"

"He's in the room."

"To be honest, his condition is strange – even for a first-time pregnancy. He keeps fainting. It's not good, you know. It's abnormal."

"So what should I...?"

"... Did you remember my advice to hospitalize him?"

"I remember but I just... don't want it."

"Your egoism may kill him one day. Just you watch."

Kudo left Kanou by the door. Kanou felt his chest hurt. Another warning to himself. He knew it well. How long had it been since he had been telling himself that Ayase might die because of him? And now, another person telling him... everything was pushing him to the end. Even people around him could see that Ayase would probably break one day because of staying by his side. Kanou couldn't content the grief and regrets. What would have happened if he hadn't helped Ayase that day? Would he be okay? Would somebody else buy him and treat him better than he did? Would Ayase become a sex slave, or will he live better days if Kanou wasn't there to buy him from that auction?

Kanou sat on the floor, and for once in his life, he was regretting what he had done so far.

________________

"Have you told Kanou about the 42% chance of mortality?"

"... I haven't."

"I suggest you do. It's not good to keep a dangerous fact like that from your spouse."

"But I don't want him to worry!"

"That's the reason. When you're not honest, he will end up worrying a lot more."

"... No. I can do this. 42% means that I have a 58% chance of having it delivered healthy, right? I want to stay on the bright side."

"... Just a suggestion, Ayase-kun." Kudo suddenly sounded grief-stricken. "Would you just... abort this embryo? As soon as possible."

"What!? Kudo-san, I..."

"I didn't have the heart to tell you, but this is one of the cases in which the baby is just incompatible with the mother. You've seen what's happened. You keep fainting over and over again. It's not good. In the end, it's a choice between your life and the baby's."

Ayase was silent for a moment. He just couldn't get the happy face of Kanou-san from his mind. The smile and fun he had because of Ayase's unnatural conceive. Ayase just couldn't sacrifice that over his own safety.

"I will be okay, Kudo-san." Ayase smiled. "Just give me some more medicine... stronger ones... to prevent me from fainting."

"... I object. Too much of that dosage may turn into poison."

"Kudo-san... please..."

"My objective is your health."

"Kudo san... please... I beg you. I just..."

Kudo was in an uncomfortable situation; saying both yes and no meant somebody was going to be hurt. And the begging Ayase in front of him made everything harder.

"... Fine. I'll give you them. But promise me you'll stop this specific painkiller once you feel you can't control your feet, do you hear me?"

"Yes." Ayase nodded. "Thank you."

* * *

you may be tired of getting this message, but please, please review.

i poured all my imagination and time here, so at least i deserve a favorite or a review or a PM or something else.

Just say anything~! Thank you for reading.

Next!


	12. Chapter 11

I THINK I REALLY WRITE I HAVE NO OTHER STORY TO WORK ON, :)

AND PLEASE, AT LEAST TELL ME YOU READ THIS... I AM LIKE RABBITS; EASILY DIE AND DOWN HEARTED BECAUSE OF LONELINESS.

* * *

"Thank you for the patronage!" the cashier smiled at Ayase before he went out from the supermarket. Ayase smiled. He has just finished his weekly groceries. It's quite hard these days, since he has swollen feet and his body felt so heavy. It took him half an hour just to walk for the usual 10 minutes to the supermarket. People smiled at him nowadays, asking and advising him stuff about pregnancy. It was easier to let them think Ayase was a girl all along. Well, not everybody wished to know the real truth. Ayase looked down and patted his growing stomach. He has quite a round belly; not as big as a normal pregnant lady but it is clearly visible. He was eating well, all right, due to sudden hunger and increased appetite. Kudo-san told him that the sudden increase was normal. And now he found that wearing pregnancy dresses are more comfortable than putting on the usual pants and shirt.

Mind you, it wasn't easy at first. He felt weird having air coming in and out through the skirt of the dresses; having used to have a pant covering his whole legs the whole time makes him felt like he was half nude in public. He uses thick stockings and since his hair has grown quite a bit, he braids it sideways. He started to use those underwear and bra to support his growing belly and breast. Embarrassed at first, but now he understands why women need bra and panties. They are useful and sometime really comfortable. His face became smaller and easily flushed with skin getting translucent and glowing everyday. No matter how you look, Ayase has turned completely to a young expecting mother.

Ayase smiled whenever he thought about this. Kanou-san has found it particularly adorable. He just couldn't leave Ayase alone and more times than not; they ended up taking bath together. Kanou loves to cupped his breast and stroke his belly (God, Ayase felt really embarrassed whenever he think about it), insisting to wash Ayase's body warmly and gently. Kanou found more reasons to come back early and spend some cuddly time (not exactly. It was quite tiring for Ayase since Kanou's means of cuddly time is him sleeping on Ayase's lap while reading documents and calling people) on the sofa. One thing that makes Ayase feel awkward in those times was because Kanou will somehow ended up kissing his belly, saying embarrassing stuff like how he could hear his little daughter smiling. Ayase was a business university student; but he knows well enough that you just can't hear somebody smiling.

Ayase pushed the trolley. He bought this small but efficient trolley last week. He is 6 months now; he is less mobile with the growing belly to support. Last 4 months was hectic; Homare was assigned by Kanou to guard Ayase whenever Kanou wasn't around. Ayase felt it was rather ineffective, since Kanou clearly was busy and needed both of the twins's help. Just last week he succeeded in persuading Kanou to let him take care of himself. True enough; in those four months, Ayase was only attacked twice by unrelated small fries (one punk who tried to ask Ayase for money and another was a lowly gang member whom thought Ayase was a chick). In the end, Kanou assigned Homare back into the office while Ayase promised Kanou that he will call him every half an hour if he need to went out (which is limited to 3 times a week).

It wasn't all ok with Ayase. He felt lonely inside the big mansion, restless and bored. The house was never as clean as now because Ayase, out of boredom, had attempted to clean every single corner every day. He had tried to pick up new hobbies (introduced by Someya: knitting, extensive gourmet cooking and classical music; also introduced by Gion: watching AV videos—he was later sent to hospital by Kanou—which was later changed into stacks of Korean dramas). But it was enjoyable only on the first few days; Ayase couldn't keep it for too long since he felt lonely.

In his alone hours, Ayase couldn't help but remembered those lonely times he spent alone after his family's death. He was alone and the ticking of the wall clock filled his ear. Nothing was there, the silent was so loud and somehow he just wanted to close his eyes and never wake up. Which was a bad thing since Kudo-san always reminds him to stop the medication if he found it was getting harder to control his body. But the medication works wonders; it stopped the vomiting, dizziness and nausea almost completely. Ayase hid the tons of medications (in various tablets and capsules) he required inside the small drawer in the kitchen—the least place Kanou will able to be found—so that Kanou-san would never found them.

Ayase noticed that there were always two men following him. At first he thought it was just his feeling because these guys never there whenever Kuba Homare was around, but as now Kuba went back to his usual job, Ayase could feel that the two of them was actually stalking him.

Somehow he felt a strange connection with those two guys.

He didn't tell Kuba about it. Ayase thought Kuba should already know both of them since even Ayase can realize their presence. For him, if Kuba didn't found them dangerous then they are not a threat. Ayase stopped walking and opened his groceries, took two bento set he just bought specially for them and looked back.

Both men seemed startled that Ayase smiled at them, and tried to hide behind the pole; however Ayase called them and reluctantly, the came nearer.

"Good morning."

Hearing Ayase's greetings make them looked awkward. In the end one of them nodded. "_Good Morning_."

English! Suddenly Ayase realized. These guys are talking in English! Thye looked like Asian though. Do they understand Japanese? He stared at the bento in his hand.

"_This issu… bento… eat pleasze?"_ Ayase awkwardly tried his oh-so-good English. Both of them looked at Ayase and then stared at each other before laugh heartily.

Ayase pouted. God; he was going to give the bento to them before they laugh at him like that. He was ready to leave the bento before one of the men said, "_Wait!"_

Ayase looked back.

"_Sorry. We were just laughing at your fuckin' strange accent. Well… thanks."_

Ayase smiled. Although he didn't understand what they were talking about, he could catch the phrase 'thank you', so he answered, "welcome. I hope you like it."

"Well, do you follow us following you?" one of the man asked in funny Japanese. Now is Ayase's turn to laugh at their lack of Japanese conversational skill. It was fun, talking to somebody else after spending days alone inside the big mansion. Ayase nodded. "yes, I realized you were always following me. Were you asked by Kanou-san to follow me?"

"hmm? No. We are tourist." The one with black sunglasses and Hawaiian T-shirt answered. They were clearly dressed like tourist. The other man, with long tied black hair and bigger built continued. "We here to see Buddha. That's it. Give bento to me. I hungry."

Ayase smiled and gave them the bento. "Please help yourself. I think we are fated to meet since I have seen you so many times before."

Both of them smiled.

"_Yeah, we met you coz it's work, kid. If it's not work, you had ended up under us in 2 minutes. Shit, why is she so cute?"_

"_Yea. Too bad she's taken. Pregnancy suit her thou. She is really beautiful. Geez, is she fearless or something? She gave us food without knowing whether we are friend or foe?"_

"_That's why she needs protection. She is dumb enough. Usually the scary Jap guy always with her, but he is gone now." _

Ayase, whom English mark was only 50 when he left school, couldn't follow the conversation. Ayase didn't know that he was wrongly taken as a female (well, in a sense they were half right) and they were actually there to protect him. They were professionals who looked like fools; they were used to danger and the casual camouflage usually let people's guard down and makes it easier to attack. They were actually succeeded in protecting Ayase from 3 attempted kidnaps in those 4 months. They prevent everything before even Kuba Homare realized what happened.

That was the first time Ayase talked with them and in time, they gradually developed affection for the little blond creature.

________________________

Another usual day in Kanou's office.

"The front glass is repaired and broken again, Boss Kanou." Kuba Misao stoically reported to his boss. "It cost less this time because the glass company gave us discount since we had already changed the window glass 10 times this month."

"… Ask them to give more discounts since we will get it more in the future too."

"Yes sir. Next: I have received an offer from Katsuhira-sama to exchange the deal with Miya-sama this morning. Do you want to precede the offer?"

"No. Tell him to fuck off."

"Yes sir. Next: Another message from anonymous caller; they wanted to exchange Ayase-san with the deal."

"Fuck. Give me my phone."

Kanou took he phone from Kuba harshly and dialled the first fast-dial.

"Good afternoon, Kanou residence." Ayase's voice came through the other end.

"Where are you?"

"I am at home."

"Are you safe?"

"Yes, Kanou-san. I am fine."

Kanou let go a relief breath. To Kuba he barked, "Cross that spam call from the list."

"Yes, sir." Kuba Misao stopped reporting for a while, knew his boss wouldn't be happy if he interrupt now.

"Hallo?" Kanou talked back to the phone. He was now smiling. "How are you today?"

"ngg… I went shopping an hour ago. It was good since I had a lot of cheap vegetables."

"oh, really? Then what's for dinner?"

"It's nikujaga today, Kanou-san."

"Oh, I will look forward for it then."

"Yes, please. And… Good luck with your job, Kanou-san."

Kanou smiled while blushing a bit. Another stupid conversation that warmed the heart yet brought a bit of sadness. Until when could he keep Ayase inside that cage? Until when Ayase will stay beside him and answer his phone calls like this? Will Ayase… broke down and leave him someday?

Kanou rubbed his temple and said good bye to Ayase. He closed the phone and continued his work. It was like a heaven in a way for Kanou. These 4 months, he has gotten 3 deals that worth more than Miya actually asked. And Kanou wasn't that stupid to be truthful to her too. He kept everything in order, using the money instalment from Miya to fund some big projects with high interest and deals. Everything sounded good in his hand now. The expected prank calls, threat and danger were also emerging like mushroom. But mostly were just prank and unimportant. People think twice before they cross him; and think even further when they knew the woman who backed him up. The work load was just as good as Kanou wants and expected. As professional workaholics, he had always known the worst and done the best.

Kanou was surprised to find nothing happened so far with Ayase. He expected at least Ayase will be kidnapped by a group or two, since Ayase was well known now as his solely weak point. However that wasn't the case and he could always found Ayase welcoming him at home with sweet smile of his. Not a single scratch. How lucky Kanou is?

But he knows this is not just luck. This is something. His mother should have done something.

Up until now, government and police haven't done anything about the money. Kanou knew that this will be the time when they start to interfere and suspect him. Kanou has made some prevention and some back up plans; but what he'll be afraid was maybe they'll start to ask Ayase. And they have the right since they have the law on their side to interrogate people. Everything came back to Ayase again.

Kanou sighed. There were times when he felt like Ayase was such a big burden. He need to make more back up plans just because Ayase's existence. If only he need not to protect him, he could achieve more in this time limit. If only he need not to protect him, Kanou could have used all resources without counting consequences since he has nothing to lose except his own life. Measuring safety for two is more troublesome than one. And God bless how frail Ayase was. Kanou could hear the sound of him vomiting sometimes in the morning by the toilet. He could see how Ayase's feet swollen to the abnormal size for his body proportion. He could sense that Ayase is now frail and weak but pretended he was as strong as ever.

But when he went back home and saw him in his apron, Kanou melted. When he saw the beautiful smile and blushing face, he stopped thinking. And when he looked and touch the belly… he wanted to cry. He just couldn't bear to separate from any of it. Ayase has already taken a special place inside his head that no one else, even his father, could replace. Ayase's changed of outfit also didn't help. He really looked beautiful in those dresses. Kanou has imagined numerous times about how to keep Ayase in those outfits forever… of course by keeping him pregnant. But that was just a wild imagination. A pineapple every single day for him was nothing compared to the smile Ayase will give him when he received that.

Yes, he has been showering Ayase with pineapple since 4 and half months ago when Ayase craved for pineapple for the first time. Kanou himself has fed up with the smell and taste, a single picture of pineapple was enough to bring the reaction he have for sweets, but Ayase always gladly cut it up and served it as a midnight snack for him. He couldn't refuse, of course. He wondered when Ayase will get fed up with that freaking fruit and change for some other stuff which is better than pineapple.

Nikujaga…eh?

Having to know someone was there at home definitely waiting for you isn't bad at all.

Kanou smiled to himself.

_Is this happiness?

* * *

_

PLEASE REVIEW?

PLEASE FAVORITE?

ANYTHING... JUST TALK TO ME~! i AM WAITING WITH MY EYES OPEN, SINCE IT'S THE LAST OF MY HOLIDAY... UGH.


	13. Chapter 12

PLEASE KEEP IN MIND THESE FACTS FOR THIS CHAPTER:

AYASE IS IN THE MIDDLE OF EMOTION ROLLER COASTER RIDE (DUE TO HORMONAL IMBALANCE).

THE TWO BOYGUARD (WHO DISGUISED AS THE TOURISTS) DIDN'T KNOW THAT AYASE IS A MAN. AND SINCE I DON'T KNOW THEIR NAME, PLEASE BEAR WITH DESCRIPTION ONLY.

THE ITALICS ARE SAID IN ENGLISH (HELL; I MEAN… LET'S PRETEND I WROTE NORMAL CONVERSATION IN JAPANESE).

I have a tendency to play with time in my plot—sometimes I can drag one day into 3 chapters and then skip 4 months in the next. This one chapter is happening in one same day. What day, I don't know. Tuesday maybe. :) LOL.

enjoy ~!

* * *

"I am going first."

"Please have a safe trip." Ayase smiled while passing on Kanou's working bag.

Kanou opened his mouth, "Promise me you don't…"

"…Open the door for stranger, take care of yourself and call you if something happened." Ayase laughed while continuing Kanou's warning. Kanou startled for a second before smiling too.

"Hey, don't you think it's rude to cut somebody else's line like that?"

"But you have been saying that to me everyday for 4 months now!"

"Well, I did, didn't I? And that reminds me you are 6 months now."

Ayase blushed. Gosh, he just couldn't help but blushing whenever he thought the time is drawing near. The so-called giving birth event. It is a scary yet somehow Ayase couldn't help but waited eagerly, a mix of difficult feelings. He has kinda overcome the fear of being a woman; now he is going through the next phase to overcome the fear of giving birth and nurture a child.

Kanou, on the other hand, really look forward to the birth of the child. He wanted to see _his_ child so badly and also he needs to have Ayase soon (actually this factor is more important). He has been in celibate for 4 months. He is almost at his limits. Someya's advise of not attacking Ayase in the pregnancy stage (Kanou unfortunately didn't listen carefully and didn't remember that it's actually only the first and last tri months) keeping ringing inside his head whenever he tried to seduce Ayase in the bathroom or bedroom. Although sometime Ayase did look like he wants it, Kanou couldn't take the risk and pulled him off his body, and went to finish himself off in the bathroom.

"Yes." Ayase smiled. "I just went to Kudo-san's clinic and he said the baby is going fine."

"Did he tell you what gender?"

"I… didn't ask. Because… I want the surprise."

Kanou smiled. "Yes, that's way is fine too. As long as you are both good, I am happy." Kanou smiled like a child. Ayase bit his lips, smiling too. The moment passed like forever. They were just standing in front of the door, he ready to go to work and he ready to get back into the kitchen to clean the breakfast utensils. But something prevents them from moving. It's like a sudden connection, without words or gesture, just suddenly like a chain linked up their hearts.

Ayase didn't want to break the comfortable silence. But Kanou needs to go.

"You…You must get going, Kanou-san."

"Yes. Then, I am going." Kanou waited. Ayase looked at Kanou's mischievous smirk and blushed. "What?"

"Where's my kiss?"

"Kanou-san!"

"All right, all right. I am going. See you."

"Yes, see you." Ayase closed the door behind him and place the security code back. Ayase felt his heart beats faster. The sudden romantic atmosphere just now made him out of breath. Suddenly Kanou-san looked so handsome and cool… just suddenly. He always sees the bigger man as a muscular tall beast. He is huge and definitely stronger than him. But he never knows… Kanou san was that handsome.

_Another lonely day inside the mansion_. Ayase sighed, but, today he is going to make something special for dinner. He is now used to this silent, where the voice of Mozart: Twinkle Twinkle Little Star filled the air while he was vacuuming the room. But alone is still alone no matter how you describe it. And loneliness is painful.

Suddenly the door was knocked again. _Kanou-san?_ Ayase thought. _Did he forgot something?_ Ayase blushed. He shouldn't show any of those silly feelings to Kanou-san, so he bit his lips and pushed the security code before checking who was knocking.

"Kanou-san, what…" Ayase opened the door and his question trailed off when he saw that the one standing in front of him was not Kanou. Both of the tourists he chatted with yesterday were standing in front of his door.

"_Hi, Cherie. Please come with us."_

_"Silly! Use Japanese!"_

"Hi, come with us please." The man whom can speak Japanese better suddenly spoke to him. Ayase went pale and tried to close back the door; but as expected, they were faster than Ayase. They hold the door open with force and Ayase couldn't help but hanging to the door handle for life.

"Don't afraid. We are not bad. We are here to take you somewhere."

"There are no thieves that call themselves thief!" Ayase retorted back.

"Our boss wants to meet you."

"Isn't your boss Kanou-san?" Ayase asked. Yes; if their boss is Kanou-san, then why would they want to take him away from the mansion? Moreover Kanou didn't say anything to him about this.

"No, our boss is not Kanou. We are Miya-sama bodyguard."

Ayase froze. Miya… that name reminds him of everything and the reason why he was locked inside the cage. Suddenly he felt rage and emotions filled his chest. Yes; that impolite woman who insult him to his face! He remembered his anger to her back and looked sharp at the two men.

"If she wants to meet me, why don't she come here herself? Why must I come to her place?" Ayase felt deviant.

The two men were startled for a moment before laughing.

"_you hear that? She asked Miya to go meet her instead!"_

_"… God, she really dumb or what? She doesn't know what she was asking. But I like her spirit."_

_"Yeah; totally. Should we ask her to come?"_

_"…do you think its worth to bet our head on?"_

_"No. Funny as it is, I don't want to task any risk with that woman. Let's take her." _

Ayase just saw the sudden handkerchief coming to his face. The next second he passed out on the floor, and the two guys took her away from the mansion's left-opened door.

_____________

When he opened his eyes, he realized he was not back at Kanou's mansion. The room looked unfamiliar; but then, the men who stood before the bed looked familiar.

"Wake up already, princess?"

"Nng… where am I?"

"In my suite." Suddenly a woman entered the door and Ayase Yukiya, 19, felt that hair in his whole body stood up. He jerked upward and sat straight on the bed. Miya smiled. "My, my. You look like a cat."

"…I am not a cat." Ayase answered defensively.

Miya sighed. "As I expected, we couldn't talk smoothly. Well, then I will make everything simpler." Miya moved her hand, and Alfred came magically from behind the door, taking out a big suitcase. The butler elegantly opened the suitcase and inside was stacks of money and 2 gold bars.

"This is my offer. Simple, as you guessed. Take this and be gone from Somuku's life. I'll take care of the abortion fee."

"A…Abort?"

"I won't take the risk of you using the child to blackmail him one day. I will personally pay your so-called debt to him. Isn't that fine? I will make sure you can life good for at least 40 years. That's a deal from me. So what's your answer?"

Ayase was shocked.

He didn't know how to describe his feelings right now. All he wanted was to slap this woman, but he didn't know why.

Ayase felt like he fell into a black hole. He didn't care about debt, money or the gold she offer. He had just forgotten that he had a debt to Kanou since this 4 months passed like a fleeting dream. But it wasn't the things that occupy his mind right now. There he was, 5 months and over, waiting eagerly for a baby to come. The baby is the fruit of his love… to Kanou-san. It is very precious. He is scared, yes, but the feeling of happiness and the suspense of waiting the new life to come were always filling his heart. He loves the way the child will react whenever he or Kanou-san touched his abdomen. When Ayase felt happy, the baby reacts in a delightful way, doubling the feeling of happiness for Ayase. He loves the way the child will react whenever he ate pineapple, and Ayase was sure the baby loves it so much. He loves how Kanou-san smiled whenever they talked about the child and the future. He loves the way Kanou will smile childishly when they were together. Even though it hasn't taken its complete form yet, but Ayase knows, they will love this child no matter what gender nor what shape nor what consequences on Ayase's behalf for giving birth to it.

And this woman… talked like this is a trash. An unwanted life.

"…No. I don't want this."

"…Are you sure?" Miya looked straight at the golden haired boy. His hair has grown longer to his shoulder and was braid sideways, reminding her of a village girl. His skin was smooth and white, with good long fingers and nails. In Miya's point of view, Ayase was the epitome of person who never experienced hardships. In a way, she was quite jealous of Ayase. Ayase could make his son protect him like he is so precious. Never in her live Miya had someone like that. And she hates this village girl. The innocent, beautiful, but useless village girl.

All her life she has been trying to avoid the label 'useless'. Born from a prostitute who just spent one night with her father, she was in the least place of getting his attention, name, fortune or title. People shouted 'useless' at her face, and her mother didn't even care about her. It was a typical single parenting family where the mother felt the child as a useless burden. When she was 10, her mother threw her out from the apartment to the street. "_I have done enough," _her mother said to her face, "_go to your father and make him support you for the rest of your life. I am no longer your parent." _It was just after she desperately tried to meet her father inside the organization that her father started to acknowledge her as his daughter. It wasn't easy. Many people has come to him and claimed as his sons/daughters. Some were real and some were impostors. Both want his money, title or fame. She wasn't an exception. She wants the family name, a bed to sleep and a bread to eat everyday. He took her under as the assistant of assistant of the lowest maid in the organization. In other words, being the useless jockey who does the hard and tedious jobs.

She made her life with seducing people above; her physique wasn't perfect like those supermodels men like; however she posses a charm like her father to make people follow her words without asking. And she climbed, tripped and reached the top position as she is now.

Somuku's father is the first man she made a pact with. She needs backups, he needs an heir. Both came from good gene pool. Both were hard wired and unromantic, uneasily affected by feelings, in a way, they were like mirror, similar in everything but gender. And they made Kanou Somuku in one night.

She was happy in those 9 months. Somuku's father was an attentive, strong backing whom protects her as long as she has his baby. And she felt protected for the first time in years; she told herself they both weren't in love. It was just a mutual pact between them. And she wasn't as sad as she thought she would be when Somuku and his father left back to Japan. She felt lonely, but that was it.

But she has killed the father of her son. And now, Somuku is solely her son. She should protect and use him as much as she could. She viewed this small blonde as a useless relationship for Kanou's future. She had just arranged two other engagements for Kanou. They are better, beautiful, educated and rich young ladies with good background (good here doesn't meant good in a royal way; it's more like good in a strong, underworld kind). And the way Ayase act and refuse her offer made her blood rise to the highest level.

"I am sorry but I refuse to take any of your offers."

"Hah! I have been kind to you more than what you deserved! Who do you think you are, young man?" Miya stared hard at the petite boy. "Why don't we simplify all this and finish it here?"

"I am finishing it here. I say, I flatly refuse your offer, Miya-san." Ayase stared hard back at the lady in front of him. "I won't take any offer to leave Kanou-san. He needs me. My child and I need him. We need each other."

"Why are you so confident? What make you thing he needs you? You are nobody; a burden; you don't even know him!"

"I think I know him better than you. Yes, we are not tied by blood, but it was Kanou-san who told me that even if we don't bind by blood, two people can still stays a family! I was always alone; I always yearned for a family when Kanou san gave me a new meaning of 'family'. And Kanou-san said it was OK for me to stay! So I will stay!"

"Do you think you deserved him? An orphan like you?"

"Who cares about orphan or family background when you actually care? I never think that you need to proof your background when you can proof your solid affection to a person!" Ayase started to cry in frustration, emotional due to hormone and tension. "Do you think of yourself as his mother? Do you think forcing your wish to him make you a good parent? Do you think money can solve everything? Do you think money can show love? I am in debt but I am sure I am happy now. To tell you the truth, I was looking forward to see you as Kanou-san's mother, but the reality put me off."

"I don't need to hear your comment, thank you very much! An outsider like you should just follow what we decide! I am the head of the family, you must listen to me! You are so useless and weak; you have no right to critic me! He is my son, my heir and that's all!"

The atmosphere of the room was heated. The two bodyguards were smiling awkwardly to each other, tried to be as invisible as they can. They don't wish to be drag into this women conversation. Albert, as expected, shows no reaction whatsoever. But one can tell that he was actually angry at the little ungrateful brat for yelling at his lady.

It was a cat fight, all right. Miya started to lose her temper, raising her voice.

"Kanou is my son, and I have 100% right to tell him what to do with his life. I am the one who made his life; he should listen to me. And the baby inside you also his, so it also mine. I don't need it. Just shut up and take the offer. Alfred, take him to the paediatrician …"

Ayase, with emotions took the control of his body, came nearer and slapped the woman HARD.

For a second, everybody was frozen. Their boss/master was slapped by a small pregnant boy. Miya was the most fearful current head of the organization, only few people dared to raise their voice against her. And now, a nowhere little shrimp raise his hands against her.

"That… is for Kanou-san and the baby's sake. They are not your toy or 'thing'! They are human being who perfectly capable to choose their own life and I demand apologize from you to them!" Ayase shouted in frustration and anger. "Apologize! Did you understand how hurt it is when you were ignored and treated as nothing but goods to your parent? Did you think he only want your money, your name, your position? Do you think they don't deserve to life just because you think they are useless? Do you even understand the feeling of a mother?!"

"YOU!!!" Miya snapped. She scratched Ayase's left cheek until it was bleeding with her manicured nails. Her other hand were ready to take the gun which always came inside her pocket. But the two men suddenly came between them; one catching her wrist and stopped her from going further while the other one grabbed Ayase and hold him behind himself.

_"Miya-sama. We know we are hired by you, but we don't want to let you harm a kind pregnant lady like her."_

_"Move, you fool! I am your boss, so…"_

_"No. No violence please. We don't want anything bad happen to her baby. She is pregnant. Please control yourself." _

_"If you keep touching me and protecting him like this, I will sue you!"_

_"Please do as your wish. But we came to like her, and we don't want anything bad happen to her. Just as your order."_

Miya looked confused. "_I never order you to protect him. I ordered you to bring him to me."_

_"Eh?" _now both of the guy looked confused. But in the mean time, the butler has succeeded in tackling the guy who grabbed his lady's arm and pinned him down to the floor.

_"Don't you dare to be so rude before my lady."_

Miya recovered from her shock and ordered the guards to come in and catch Ayase. She specified that if Ayase refused to cooperate they can just shoot him. The room was chaotic. The other man was fighting with the surprisingly strong butler, while the other was trying to protect Ayase from 3 bodyguards who just came in so suddenly.

_"Move your butt, man! Hey, bring her out of here! Don't mind me!"_ the man who was wrestling with the butler shouted to his friend.

_"see you in the place then." _The other man who was shielding Ayase suddenly took out his gun and aimed at the door. He took Ayase in one arm and pulled him out of the room. They quickly run through the door, hopped into the luckily opened lift and went down to the basement, where he pulled Ayase hurriedly towards the rented car. Ayase was out of breath; he wasn't supposed to be running with his current condition. And the tension didn't help either.

"I promise you will be home safely. Just hang in there."

The guy smiled although he was busy trying to start the car. Ayase felt panic shots through; but somehow he just couldn't forget about the other guy.

"What about your friend? Will he be OK?"

"I think he will. Just calm down and relax. My friend's strong."

They hurriedly went out of the parking lot; some people in black were shooting their guns, aiming at the car with Ayase and the man inside. Luckily they were faster and in no time, they were out in the road.

"Don't bite your tongue."

"Eh…???" Ayase questioned the statement but understood it the next minute. The guy drove the small car in 120 km/hour.

______________________________

"Don't open the door to anybody. The security is enough to prevent they coming in. please take care. We might not meet again. See you."

"But!" Ayase didn't even know the name of this man. He hasn't said thanks to them either. The man smiled and rumpled his hair.

"Bear a healthy child, wont you? The bento you gave was nice. Bye!"

The man closed the door in front of Ayase's face and quickly returned to help his friend. Ayase trembled while locking the door and putting in the code. His legs gave away and he stumbled on the front room's floor.

His heart was beating so loud. He couldn't breathe for a minute. He felt so heavy and tired. The whole thing was just like an action movie he saw last week but now he was the main character. He hasn't expressed his gratitude towards those 2 men who helped him. And he… he slapped Miya. He slapped his own mother in law.

Ayase made it to the sofa and sunk down with his additional weight. He didn't regret he hit Miya. She deserved it. She needs to start thinking about Kanou. Ayase just couldn't forgive her for thinking Kanou-san and their baby as less than a thing. Her attempts to control Kanou-san were too much. Ayase just couldn't forgive her whenever he remembered the nightmares and pale Kanou-san last time.

Ayase then realized that his cheek was bleeding. He wiped it with tissue and went to treat it with first aid kit. _What should he said to Kanou-san about his cheek? _Ayase thought to himself. _He didn't want to make him worry. _Ayase was sure that if Kanou sees this, he will be sad and started to blame himself again. Ayase didn't want any of that.

Ayase started to feel the gradual relaxing effect from the adrenaline rush before. He fell down to the sofa and closed his eyes.

_What should I say to Kanou-san…? ..Should I even tell him?_

He went into a dreamless slumber.

* * *

I think this chapter has too much drama. Sorry. *_* i promise the next chapter will be filled with more humor and love. or not.

but i just cant help but think this chapter is HARD. it makes me rock my brain out how to write out Miya and Ayase's cat fight (It's fun thou).

please tell me your opinion.

please favorite?

Thank you for the reviews and fave i have received until now ^_^ I really appreciated those ~Thank you~! .


	14. Chapter 13

MY MOST PRODUCTIVE DAY~! I PRODUCE TWO CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY! BUT PLEASE REVIEW IN BOTH NOT ONE :) I BEG YOU.... LOL!

THANK YOU FOR SEE1LIKE FOR BEING SO SUPPORTIVE :)

ENJOY!

* * *

Kanou opened the door with his key. He was balancing himself between opening the door, carrying his bag and another pineapple for Ayase. He wanted to surprise Ayase since he could go back home so early today.

The deal went so smooth. It will be over in 2 weeks time. He was in a good mood; maybe he should take Ayase dinner somewhere. He knows Ayase will be happy. Kanou smiled. Sometime he caught Ayase off guard and stared deeply at him. When Kanou ate his food gleefully, he could see Ayase's soft eyes on him telling him that he adore him. When Kanou was busy talking in phone while having his head on top of Ayase's lap, Kanou could sneak a peek through Ayase eyelashes and saw that the beautiful blue orbs were looking at him almost lovingly. When they were in bed together, sometimes Kanou could feel Ayase sneak a cheek kiss when he though Kanou was fast asleep.

It was a first time for him. Up until last year, the closest he felt like this was when he was having an orgy with 3 women at the same time; the satisfaction of achieving desire, contentedness because he could grab 3 beauties in his hand, the greatness he felt because everybody listened to him. In a way, it's like what his mother taught him. Control is everything. Money is everything. Power is everything. Never be a useless person.

Then, again, whenever he thought his live now, somehow it felt more satisfying. Spending silence beside Ayase makes him felt like he finally have somebody to depend and protect to. Having the small boy inside his arms makes Kanou felt better than having nude ladies with perfect bodies around him. Having someone to welcome him home without those perfumes and seduction acts makes Kanou felt he finally found the real thing.

He knows he is softer now. He knows somehow people may call him getting weaker. Maybe it's age; maybe it's time. But he would never blame it on Ayase again. He likes this softness. Everyday passed with similar comfortable peace. He never had it since he was small. All he knows he was brought up by his father and his friends; having no mother whatsoever. When he looked at Someya's mother hugging him ('she' was a 'he' back then), somehow he felt a bit, just a bit, envy. Those hands… what is it felt like? Those smile just for you… how does it felt like? He would never know since his own mother turned out a female version of his own dad; but somehow he believes the feelings should be similar to the one he felt whenever Ayase smiled or kissed him. At last, he found them.

But there was nobody welcoming him today. Kanou was alarmed and straight entered the room. He was relieved when he saw Ayase was sleeping on the sofa. The afternoon sunlight peek through the window, which was half open and gentle breeze flew in and blew his 'wife's' hair. Ayase was in deep sleep, oblivious of the voices that Kanou made. Kanou smiled and came nearer.

He was intending to touch the small boy when suddenly he realized that new scratch scars were painting Ayase's cheek red. He felt rage. What happened? Who dare to scratch his lover? What is… Ayase is clumsy, but a scratch scar is not something you get from clumsiness.

Was his mother there? Was she meeting Ayase? Has she done something again?

Kanou sat on the floor, beside the sofa. God; why is he blaming everything on his mother again? Maybe it was just Ayase's usual clumsiness. His mother wasn't even here. She was back in USA 4 months ago, straight after Kanou sealed the deal with her. She shouldn't be here anymore… should she?

Kanou looked at his hand. He, after getting Ayase, was he getting weaker or… stronger?

"Ka…Kanou…san~????" suddenly he could hear Ayase shouted in his ear. "Why are you home so early?"

"I finished today earlier. What? You don't like come home earlier?"

Ayase vigorously shake his head. "No. I am glad." But then he realized he has been too honest and blushed. "I… I just haven't made any dinner yet."

"Nah; it's fine. Let's go eat out."

"But, I!"

"You what?"

"I have… been thinking of making a special dinner today. A new menu."

"hmm?"

"I found the recipes when I searched internet yesterday, Kanou-san. I want to try them out. Will you wait for a moment?"

"Let me help you."

"n..No! Kanou-san you can just wait here! You are tired from work, aren't you?"

"But you are too clumsy, Ayase. Look, you have even scratched your face…"

Kanou trailed off. As he saw Ayase's face flinched and scared for a moment, he caught everything. He suddenly understood.

"What happened? Who had done that to you?" He harshly pulled Ayase's arm. Ayase flinched. Kanou felt anger rose again beyond his control.

"No, nothing. Really!"

"What? Have you done something I shouldn't know? Who is it? What happened? Tell me, AYASE!"

"…It's nothing…"

"Ayase, do you think I am not trustful enough?"

"But of I say it out, you will blame yourself again!"

Kanou was startled. What… is he talking about? Ayase's eyes started to get wet.

"You will worry and blame yourself again. You felt worse. But I felt even worse! I don't want to become your burden, Kanou-san! I am fine, I can take care of myself, so stop thinking too much! I was in danger, yes, but it wasn't all your fault! I have chosen this and this is my responsibility to go down the path I chose with you! So… please, please be happy. Please stay by me and depend on me. Please be happy on our behalf. It's not fair if it's always you who protect me! I am a man, too! I want to protect my lover too!!!"

"A…Ayase…" Kanou blushed. He was still sitting on the floor beside the sofa. Their face was lined up vertically. Ayase stared hard at him.

"Tell me, Kanou san. Tell me I am not your burden."

Kanou was silenced and he finally nodded.

_________________________

Kanou opened the door harshly. Behind him there were mountains of corpses filling the hallway.

"WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM?" The beast roared in anger and searced target for his anger.

Miya looked away. "You don't even greet me first. I have just arrived here yesterday, you know."

"I don't care you get here or not, just fucking leave us alone! I have done your deal; I will give you the last instalment! And we are done, you hear me? The 5 months deal is over in two weeks! I wish to never hear from you again!"

"Don't you be so arrogant, young man!" She rose and went up against Kanou. The difference in height does make an intimidating scene but Miya didn't even flinch. Honestly, Kanou was scared a bit, but the anger and feelings he had for Ayase Yukiya has made him there, stood fast. Suddenly he didn't feel that bad anymore. In front of him stood the woman he feared for live 10 years ago; but now she is so small and insignificant anymore. It feels like he has grown up. Why did he fear this woman? She is nothing; how did she make him meekly follow her ways of doing things?

"I am your mother, Somuku Kanou! And you are my heir! So I demand you to go with me to USA next week!"

"Don't talk rubbish."

"I am not talking rubbish. The whole deal is just a final trial for your ability to replace me! I have specially remanded you to the highest five, and they have acknowledges you as a suitable successor for me! Isn't that awesome? You can take over my place without having to crawl from the start! Be thankful of me, you damn child!"

Miya was expecting Kanou to thank her when she suddenly realized how cold Kanou's stare on her. He looked down on her as if she was a crazy lone woman who talked nonsense.

"Why do you think I am grateful to you?"

Miya, for the first time in her life, just realized how scary man can become when they were angry. She shivered. She wanted to run. Fortunately for her, Albert suddenly grabbed her from behind and shielded her from Kanou's cold angry stare.

"Pardon me, young master. But it is inappropriate to shock your mother like that."

"I don't care." Kanou grabbed the butler's collar. "Move or I will break your arm now."

"I will move if you promise not to hurt Miya-sama."

"Then be my guess."

Kanou pulled the butler's arm and dislocated the shoulder in an instant. The butler wriggled and writhed, but made no attempt whatsoever to move from his lady. Miya was panicked. Her butler was clearly in pain, but he just wouldn't move.

"Albert, I order you now, move!" Miya shouted in tension.

The butler wriggled. "No, my lady. I couldn't afford to let you be hurt by this man. I wouldn't move."

"Then I'll help you." Kanou, now was full throttle, grabbed the butler's shoulder, pressing it to induce pain and easily threw him away to the wall. The butler flew and hit the wall hard; he lost his consciousness in the next second.

"Now it's you and me."

"…So..Somuku, calm down. I am not afraid of you." Suddenly Miya changed her approaching method. "Why are you angry? I have offered you the best preposition: you get the place everyone wished for their life so easily! And I know you can do it! I know you will love the money and power! It's an easy way!"

"I am not a part of your 'everyone', dear mother."

"A…a… But you are my son! So you should take this opportunity! I have made this chance especially just for you! This is part of my love for you!"

"that's the part I don't get for live. Where in the world a mother shows her love by dragging his son into drug world? And if you think I thought of you as a mother figure, you couldn't be further from the truth. All I remember of you is a pure pain, fear and loneliness. Not even worth saying love to. You are not a mother, Miya, face it." Kanou looked disgusted and so tensed that layers of skins appeared at his forehead. "You are a bitch whom only think of herself. A selfish slut."

"You!! How dare you insult me like that!!!!"

"Your pride is in the way, mother." Kanou smirked. "Don't you remember who told me not to make pride be a hindrance in getting what you want? Now, promise me you will leave us alone. Or I will really… _kill_ _you._"

His cold stare was enough to make all her hair stands. Miya cornered in her own den; couldn't take it and unconsciously took her gun and aimed it at Kanou. Kanou was quicker; he caught her wrist and knocked the gun, but she has pulled the rigger before that.

A gun shot was heard. Kanou could feel the heat rising from his cheek. His left cheek was almost shot; but the bullet just cut through a small part of his skin. The heat was unbearable, but Kanou was used to it since he had been using the thing to play in his childhood and teenage years. Blood trickle down and it completed the look of Kanou, the Beast-from-Hell look. He spit on the woman's face before shoving the gun to her throat.

"One trigger, mother. And you will be gone."

"So..Somuku!"

"Promise me you wouldn't touch him or the baby anymore. I don't kill you now since we are still in a deal and you are my _mother._" Kanou sounded so disgusted when he spoke the last word. "But no next time. Like what father has taught me. Never loose to family."

"… I wouldn't care about you anymore, you ungrateful brat!"

"I very much appreciate that. Now, let us settle the deal peacefully. I will send you the last of the money next week. Until then, don't you ever dare to mess anything up." Kanou opened the gun and took out all of the bullets inside.

"see you, _okaa-san." _Kanou smiled devilishly and went out of the room. "Have a nice trip in Japan."

_____________

Kanou felt so satisfied. He felt like he was just getting another good adrenaline rush. He felt free from his mother's shadow. He was wondering why on earth did he crimpled like a stupid dog whenever his mother was concerned? Now when he thought back, she wasn't that bad either. He has outdone both his father and mother. Good for him.

"Kuba, drive back to the office."

"Boss Kanou, something urgent come out."

"What?" Kanou asked impatiently. "What happened?"

"The arrest warrant is sent just now. And Interpol is waiting by the office and… your mansion."

"…SHIT!"

_Ayase!_ The police have come. "Arrest warrant? But they don't even have the letter of inspection yet!"

"They apparently have already collected enough proof to take you to court, Boss Kanou." Kuba Misao answered matter of factly. "A lot of our transaction records were leaked onto their hands. They have the whole data on underground deals that we made. It suggested that somebody leaked out the data to them."

"…Who is it?"

"Since it's a specific data that is highly classified even in our company, my guess fell on Miya-sama's behalf."

Kanou couldn't believe his ears. She again. … Just how much did she want to control him? Kanou massaged his temple before barking to Kuba. "Take me back first!"

Shit. Ayase could be interrogated right now and trapped into acknowledging something he didn't even know. Just how he hates Interpol and their way of doing things, Kanou knows that not every justice they carried out was really fair.

His mother again… how much longer she wants to make him confused like this?

* * *

HOW IS IT? HOW IS IT?

TELL ME, REVIEW ME, ADD ME FAVE, ANYTHING --JUST TELL ME OR I WONT CONTINUE!

(JOKING) HAHAHAHA... THE USUAL THREAT RIGHT? BUT IT IS NORMAL, I THINK, SINCE WE WRITE THIS OUT OF TEARS AND BLOOD, SO IT'S AT LEAST WORTHY TO ASK FOR A REPLY! OR REVIEW IN THIS MATTER~! I AM WAITING THEN!


	15. Chapter 14

HI~! I CHANGED THE PREVIOUS CHAPTER, I AM SO SORRY. I JUST SUDDENLY HAVE THIS NEW INSPIRATION...

SORRY FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE READ THE FIRST CHAPTER 14 I POSTED JUST NOW.

ENJOY!

* * *

Kanou was relieved he got there in time.

When he came out from the lift, he could see Ayase was trying to cover himself with the mansion's heavy door against the pull of two men who wore black suit. He looked like he was almost at his limits; hanging to the door for his dear life. The two men in black suits were clearly from Interpol; they looked arrogant and self-important. They were trying to pull back the door so they can come in.

"Open this door, madam!"

"No! Kanou-san said I shouldn't let anybody suspicious in!"

"But we are from Interpol! We are not suspicious!"

"You looked like one!" Ayase screamed. "I have seen enough to know that black suit means yakuza! Go away!"

Kanou couldn't help but laughed. Ayase looked so unbearably funny yet adorable in the same time. Kanou knows he should be regretting the fact that he has been dragging Ayase enough time to associate black suit with yakuza, but when he heard it from Ayase's mouth it seemed so cute he couldn't bear it.

"You can see our badge! Here!"

"Is that a real badge? I never see one in my life, so… maybe I shouldn't listen to you." Ayase pulled the door suddenly, and locked it from inside. The two men were stunned in their place, looking at the closed door.

"BITCH!" one of them shouted.

Kanou jerked and straight away pulled him up by his collar.

"What did you call him, HUH???"

The man whom collar was grabbed by Kanou stuttered for moment. Kanou looked like he is ready to send him to hell, so he could only mutter countless apologize. Kanou didn't let go his grasp. He pulled him higher until bubbles came out from the agent's mouth. The other guy was frozen for a moment, but he quickly regain his composure.

"Ah! Kanou Somuku! You are under arrest!" the other man pulled his gun, but Kuba Misao was faster. He kicked the gun from the man's hand and pinned him down to the floor.

"Boss, instructions please."

"Make him have a temporary amnesia. He shouldn't know I am here."

"Yes, sir." Kuba Misao stoically banged the head of the agent in his hand to the floor. Once. Two times. Three. Four. Five. The man hovered a bit before went unconscious.

"He is unconscious, sir. And I have damaged his temporal lobe. He should have a temporary amnesia."

"More like trauma for me." Kanou smirked. "Good. Ayase, open the door. It's me."

The silence followed.

"Ayase, it's me. Just open."

The door was opened, and Ayase pulled out his head. "…Kanou-san!" Ayase's face suddenly brighten up. Kanou honestly was quite taken aback with the reaction.

"Welcome back!" Ayase smiled. Kanou smirked.

"Yea, I am home. Sorry for these. They are just…"

Kanou couldn't finish his sentence. Ayase suddenly went out and hugged him. Kanou was totally frozen. The little creature by his hips was hugging him so tight he couldn't hold back.

"Ayase?"

Kanou asked softly, tried to touch the small delicate creature by his hips. But then he realized that actually Ayase was crying.

"Ayase? Calm down… why are you crying? Sorry for surprising you like this, this thing won't happen again, I promise."

"No…No." Ayase sobbed into Kanou's suit. "It's not that…."

"Then?" Kanou didn't know any other reason why Ayase was crying. "Did they say anything harsh?"

Ayase nodded.

"What did they say?" Kanou asked softly. "Do you want me to kill them?"

"NO~!" Ayase let go of Kanou's body and looked up. Kanou was quite taken aback with the amount of tears in the blue orbs. "Don't kill them! I am more worried about you, Kanou-san!"

"Ha?"

"They said you are going to be arrested! I don't want that! I know jail is a very scary place! No! You shouldn't let yourself be arrested!"

Kanou couldn't content his laughter. Ayase was so… cute. Gosh. This is the first time he wanted to laugh like crazy. He is happy, for sure. Ayase cared about him so much. But it is also funny. Ayase telling him not to get caught: it's so out of character for him. but then Kanou could feel the depth of Ayase' worry and feelings for him. Then maybe… maybe… this is a sign he could propose to Ayase now.

"Ayase."

"ye..yes?" Ayase was busy wiping out his tears. "What…"

"Will you marry me?"

Now it's Ayase turn to feel shocked. He looked at Kanou as if Kanou was just saying he got meningitis. "Pa…pardon me? What did you say?"

Kanou blushed. "I damn say let's get married! Don't tell me to repeat it twice!"

Ayase was frozen. "A…A… I need to get my medicine."

"You don't want to?"

"…" Ayase looked at the door. And then he suddenly blushed so red that he just couldn't go redder than that. His whole body blushed; even his hands and feet were red. "…I wan…" he whispered inaudibly, but Kanou's ear was sensitive enough to catch it (he has been trained after living one year with Ayase. Ayase tend to speak out embarrassing things in less than audible decibels voice).

"So be it." Kanou hugged him from behind and lifted Ayase easily. "Let's get in. I'll explain briefly while you packed. We need to go from here immediately."

"Kanou-san… you are really being arrested?"

"Do you think I am that easy to be caught?" Kanou grinned so wide that it resembled a smile, a bit. Kuba Misao observed the situation with expressionless facial. In his mind, he was calculating the fact that he should call Ayase 'big sister' from now (it is a custom in Japanese Yakuza to call the wife of their boss 'big sister').

______________

"Sorry about the lack of ring. I will give you once we returned."

"It's Ok, Kanou-san.." Ayase blushed. But then he paled back. "…where are we, Kanou-san?"

"Hmm? You don't like it here?"

"…But this is too much."

Kanou smiled. "Just enjoy this. Think of it as a holiday honeymoon. Sleep. We still have 5 hours to burn here."

Ayase gulped. It was his first time sitting in an airplane; business class to bot (for Ayase it has already felt like a gold-class while Kanou was busy complaining that the seat was too narrow and short).

"You can't sleep?" Kanou whispered to Ayase's ear. Ayase shuddered. The sensation of his whisper so near to Ayase's ear made Ayase remembered that Kanou hadn't touch him for a good 4 months now.

"I…I am just…"

"Go watch movie or something. This damn plane doesn't have a gold class. I hate to fold my body like this."

"Kanou san… Are we running away?"

"Yeah. For just one week. It's a good time to relax, no? By the end of the week my deal with Miya will be finished. Then I have no connection whatsoever."

"How about… the police?"

"Ah, they will follow a blind clue right now. Kuba will do it perfectly. He is used to it. My lawyer is doing the legal stuff, so no need to bother. And by the end of these two weeks, I will have the freedom to chase her ass out."

"Her?"

"Well, my dear mother, of course. She needs to know her limits. I am sure she thought she got me this time. But I am not so sure about this, _mom_." Kanou smirked to himself. Ayase felt goose bumps. Kanou-san was plain scary. "I want to know what will she react when she knows her trap gets her from behind. I want to laugh…"  
"Stop it." Ayase slapped Kanou's cheek gently. "I don't want you to speak so badly of her."

"What?" Kanou felt annoyed. "Why suddenly you turned to be her best friend? Didn't she hurt you?"

"But she is your mother, still. I can understand why she wants you to be her successor; why she wants you to have normal relationship with good women… I understand it."

"Ayase." Kanou started to felt annoyed. "Not this again."

"But I won't give up." Ayase smiled. "I will make her understand the joy of having a child and being loved by the child we bear. I will make sure she accepts me and this baby. I am angry at her, so I need to make sure she understands me! So before that, you don't touch her! Do you hear me?"

Suddenly Ayase seemed like a man, pronouncing the pact of his life to Kanou. Kanou laughed from his nose. God, he has gotten himself a little handful wife.

"Yea. I listen." Kanou smirked.

"Good."

Kanou just couldn't content his laughter anymore. Ayase blushed; realizing he was just proclaiming something out of his usual character.

"Thank you, Kanou-san."

Kanou stopped laughing. "Ayase?"

"Thank you for guiding me here. Thank you for staying by my side all the way. Because of you I think I can make it now. I think I am ready… to give birth to this child now. I am ready to face anything… and not running away from the reality again. I am glad I met you. Thank you."

Ayase blushed furiously, hiding his face by both of his hands. He had said it! He said it! Ayase's chest was beating so hard he just couldn't take it.

Kanou, driven by his desire, hugged Ayase tightly. He locked the blonde boy's lips so sudden that Ayase forgot to breathe. Kanou enjoyed the lips as long and as passionate as he wanted; Ayase was left with staggering mind and swollen lips by the end of the hot kissing session (3 minutes).

"Ka..kanou-san!" Ayase stopped the hand inside his maternity dress. "Not here! We are in public!"

"I don't give a damn." Kanou continued kissing Ayase's neck. "They are sleeping anyway."

"Ka…Ah!"

"Ho? I thought you don't want to be found?" Kanou smirked. "Then you must control your voice, Ayase."

Ayase was ready to cry again from the tease. He shook his head. "please…Ah!"

"so cute. I should have bought gold class. no privacy here. Damn." Kanou cursed to himself. He just didn't realized that actually 6 pairs of ears in other seats were dissapointed for the sudden halt of their erotic scene.

______________________________

Miya looked furiously at the phone. She was just informed that Kanou has fled and successfully avoiding the trap she made. Shit! She thought the trap was enough… he was damn well prepared.

"He is a good candidate to replace you, dear Miya." Her boss smiled from the seat beside her. "But I don't think it's safe to choose him. Clearly he didn't want to do anything concerning you."

"But he is my son!"

"well, sometime they just like that. Rebellious, don't you think? And I think… this is the end."

"W..What?" Miya was shocked; but she forced herself to smile. "What do you mean?"

"You have no successor, my daughter is not going to marry your son, and you are dump. So, I think it's my last time with you."

"But I am still precious, didn't you say that two minutes ago?"

The fat man chuckled.

"Well, if you count 5 million silicon breast precious."

Miya blushed out of embarrassment and anger on the insult. She maybe rather old; but she was damn sure about her body. She knew she was still attractive.

"So, this is our last night. Well, how bout a last round?"

Miya snapped. She slapped the fat man and choked him with the pillow. Thanks to her exercise regime, she could make the man stopped breathing in 7 minutes flat.

"Albert!"

Albert went in, one hand on plaster. "yes, my lady?"

"Throw this fatty away. And then bring my laptop here. I need to make new thing for my dear son."

"yes, my lady."

* * *

TELL ME IF YOU WANT THE DETAILS ON THEIR HONEYMOON; OTHERWISE I WILL JUMP TO THE SERIOUS PART IN THE NEXT CHAPTER.

PLEASE REVIEW/ PM ME~!

PLEASE FAVORITE?


	16. Chapter 15

HANG IN THERE! IT'S ALMOST THE END!

ENJOY!

* * *

A dream.

This is all just a dream.

Ayase smiled while staring at his hand. The morning light peeked through the window and his fingers. He could feel like he is grasping the light.

He could feel Kanou's slow breathing on top of his neck. They were in the hotel. It has been a great 3 days. In another two, they will come home back to Japan. The days passed like dream, a blissful dream.

Kanou-san definitely has already planned this holiday beforehand. They received nothing but the best, and Ayase came to believe that Kanou has already reserved everything for them. They were currently in Hong Kong. It is a beautiful and busy metropolitan city. Ayase was in awe for almost every second of it. Kanou took him almost everywhere. They took the ferry at noon, going around night market at night, spending time by the beautiful harbour Ayase didn't know the name but surely never forgot and also enjoying delightful Chinese-style dinners. Ayase could tell that what he had eaten in his entire 3 days were more expensive than what he could afford his entire life.

Kanou's body moved. But the hands were still around him; hugging his swollen abdomen. Ayase blushed. They were naked inside the blanket. Last night was so good. Ayase knows he is in the delicate stage of pregnancy, but the situation made him couldn't resist his 'husband' advances on him. After the (romantic) dinner for two, the atmosphere was there… even Ayase couldn't lie to himself that he wanted Kanou so badly in his body. He was so gentle last night. Kanou even asked permission from the baby before he entered Ayase's rear end. It was clear that Kanou wasn't satisfied enough, but he gave up his desire before Ayase's comfort.

This is happiness. Too happy, even.

Suddenly the familiar nausea came back. Ayase wrapped his hands around his mouth. God, please not now. Not here. Not in front of Kanou-san.

It has been 4 days since he last taken his medication. He has somehow managed to suppress the pain and dizziness. The pain was still there, but he could hide the dizziness by eating more than he should. His abdomen was squirming. Felt like something was moving agitatedly inside his stomach.

"sst…" Ayase whispered to his child while patting the part of his abdomen that wasn't covered by Kanou's hands. "Please wait a moment… don't do it here…"

"…ng…" Kanou moved and opened his eyes. "Hmm? You've woken up?"

"Morning, Kanou-san." Ayase smiled unconsciously and rose up, freeing himself from Kanou. He needs to go to the toilet urgently.

"Hey… Why are you still calling me Kanou? I would like to hear my given name from you, Yukiya."

Ayase blushed and went frozen in his place. No, not now! Ayase was torn between staying and calling Kanou's name and running to the bathroom to vomit.

"Come on." Kanou rose and pulled Ayase back to the bed. "Let's stay inside for today."

Ayase pulled Kanou from him. "So…sorry." He managed to apologize before vomiting out his entire dinner to the carpet.

__________

Kanou smacked his forehead. Again, the sickness ruined the mood. He was on his way to the pharmacist, with a list of medication in his hands. Ayase forbid him from calling doctor. He said it was just the usual morning sickness. But judging from how pale Ayase was, Kanou just couldn't help but felt like Ayase was hiding something from him.

Ayase had given him a paper with names of medications he needed. Kanou rushed to the nearest pharmacy and asked the counter to give him everything on the list.

"_Sorry," _The pharmacy's sales person tells Kanou in English, "_we couldn't give you most of the drugs in this list without doctor's prescription."_

"_Why?"_ Kanou asked impatiently.

"_Because most of the medicine in this list are quite hazardous and not for casual use." _

Kanou froze. "_What do you mean?"_

"_These painkillers and antibiotics are very strong and sensitive. It may lead to death just by a small different in dosage. Only specialist could prescript these medications. May I ask who the patient is?"_

"_It's my… wife."_

"_Is she sick? Did she have some kind of cancer?"_

"_No. she is fine."_

"_Then why did she need all these?"_

"_For… morning sickness."_

"_Gosh. Is she expecting? Then the more you shouldn't give her this! You should tell her to stop using these drugs!" _

Kanou left the pharmacist in restless state. What the f**k is going on? Why is Ayase consuming all these drugs? And Kanou just realized that there is at least 6 different medicines in the list. Ayase told him to get everything. So that means… Ayase has been taking all these behind his back!

He opened the door in rage. Ayase was leaning on the bed, pale faced but still smiling.

"Welcome back."

"Ayase Yukiya. Tell me what is going on here."

"Ka…Kanou-san…?"

"Why are you taking these dangerous medicines?"

Ayase froze. His face became paler than ever. He looked away from Kanou.

"It's…It's just painkillers…"

"Did Kudo tell you to take all these?"

Ayase was silent. Kanou took that as a yes.

"Was he out of his mind? Did he want to kill you? Tell me, Ayase. I am going to kill that guy once we arrived back in Japan."

"No!" Ayase shouted. "It's not Kudo-san's fault!"

"What then? Do you know that these pills are enough to kill a horse?" Kanou hit the bed. Ayase flinched. "Why are you taking these pills? Since when have you been taking these? Why didn't you tell me???"

"I am …sorry." Ayase was teary eyes by now. "…I'll tell you, but please don't be angry or upset."

"I won't. So tell me."

"Kudo san was telling me to… abort the baby."

"WHAT????" Kanou grabbed Ayase's arm. "What the f**k?"

"No! I mean, as a doctor, he advised me against having this… child. He said the baby has grown incompatible with my body. In other words, the baby has been causing some blood poisoning due to mismatched blood type. Moreover, my body wasn't fully developed to bear a child, so… I need those drugs to help me do my usual daily chores."

Kanou was torn between rage and worry. "So… you have been taking these and forced yourself to do all the house chores? And…actually…You are not supposed to have my child?"  
Ayase nodded softly. "I don't want to abort it, so I asked Kudo-san to give any medication that he could. I need to have those everyday, and it was 4 days since I took my last one, so I am rather… weak today, Kanou-san."

"Then… What else did Kudo say?"

Ayase closed his mouth and looked away. "He didn't say anything else."

"Ayase, look at me." Kanou took Ayase into his embrace. He then stared at those blue orbs deeply. "What did he say? Tell me. Believe me. I wouldn't get mad." Kanou knew he just couldn't get mad anymore. He was feeling weak all over.

"He…he told me that the birth is going to be premature… And… my body may not withstand the burden and there is high chance of… dying. Also… I will need a caesarean to give birth and the operation itself… has 42% chance of failure…"

"If this is the case, why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I don't want to worry you too much, Kanou-san. I am still fine, so…"

"Fine?" Kanou sneered at Ayase. "You are fine? Like this? …Why don't you abort it?" Kanou asked his small voice. Ayase jerked up.

"NO! I will never abort it! I will love this child no matter what! Please, Kanou-san. Please don't make me abort it. Please!" Ayase grabbed Kanou's shirt as strong as he could while continuously crying his tears out. "Anything by that! Please!"

"But Ayase…" Kanou cupped his lover's face with his big hand. "You… might… die."

"But you are happy with the prospect of a family. I don't want to take the happiness away from you! I don't matter! I am fine; I can have this child no matter what, so please…"

"No." Kanou closed his eyes and touched his forehead to Ayase's. "You do matter. You matters so much that I can't risk of losing you. No. I need you. I choose you rather than the child."

"But!" Ayase was ready to beg when he felt something wet were dropping onto his face. And he realized Kanou was crying.

"Ka…Somuku-san…"

"You do matter. I need you. I don't care about baby or anything else. I need you."

"..."

Kanou hugged Ayase so tight he couldn't breathe.

"Please… abort it." Kanou whispered. "Promise me you'll do it." He snuggled his face between Ayase's collarbone and neck. "Please."

Ayase couldn't stop crying either. They both cried while still embracing each other in arms.

__________________

Kanou straight away bought two tickets home. He insisted on going home and informed Kuba the change in schedule. After deciding that Ayase was ready to take another 5 hours journey by plane, he was adamant to hold Ayase to the airport.

Kanou was so silent in the taxi. Ayase couldn't bring himself to cheer up either. The atmosphere was so gloomy that even the driver felt like crying. Ayase was patting his stomach softly. _No, no way he is going to abort this life._ But Kanou's beg made Ayase surrendered to the plea. He understood why Kanou wanted to abort the baby, but why cant he have a more positive thinking? Ayase felt that he is quite strong; he is ready and well enough to take the risk. And it's only 42%, so there is another 58% chance that he will survive.

Kanou; on the other hand; was busy calculating the change in plan. If they get home by the morning, they will reach Japan by noon and he will call Kudo straight away. He will make him do the operation. And he also needs to take a counter measurement since they were going home before time. It was risking the chance that he might get caught by the Interpol; but making Ayase alive is way more important than jail sentence right now.

They went though the immigration easily since pregnant ladies usually have easier access through. Kanou wondered about the lack of security since in his passport, Ayase was stated as a male. But he wasn't complaining about it and in no time, they were seated in platinum class seats.

Kanou was busy spending the first hour in the plane by typing and making plans into his laptop. Ayase didn't want to disturb Kanou, so he went to the toilet alone. The stomach pain was almost unbearable, especially after the plane take off. He felt like something was squeezing his stomach and it is hurting his belly. Moreover, the pain was different than usual; it was more intense and came in intervals spasms. Ayase needs to concentrate just to breathe.

Walking to the toilet itself was already a great labour; Ayase felt his feet were going weak. He clutched the door, and felt something was gushing between his feet. He looked down, and found out that the front of his maternity dress was soaked with red colour.

Blood.

Ayase paled. Hat should he do? He quickly went into the toilet and locked it up. He sat down and tried to stop the bleeding, but it was coming, unstoppable, from his rear end. The cruciate pain come more urgent and he cried out loud. Luckily his cries bring the stewardess attention, and she rushed to get Ayase out. But it was almost too late; blood was everywhere and Ayase was in a mess.

Kanou was alarmed and informed that his wife is in emergency state. He rushed to find Ayase half fainted with blood all over him.

"LAND THIS PLANE! FUCKING STOP THIS PLANE! DON'T YOU SEE HE NEEDS MEDICATION URGENTLY???" Kanou roared. "DO SOMETHING!"

"We will try our best, sir." The stewardess was afraid and panicked. She was crying by now. "But we couldn't land now. We are on top of the sea and it's impossible to find help here… we have already asked medical professional through the PA system; so please..please calm down."

How can he calm down? Ayase was in constant pain and writhed so badly. Oh shit! Kanou hit his head. He grabbed Ayase's hand.

It is cold.

_God, please_. Kanou prayed in his heart for the first time in his life. _Don't take him away from me. _

_

* * *

_

I THINK THE NEXT ONE WILL BE THE END.

LOL. HOW IS IT? PLEASE REVIEW? CRITIC? PM? FAVORITE?

SORRY FOR BEING A LOUSY AUTHOR.


	17. Chapter 16

THIS IS THE END (WELL, NOT REALLY. I AM NOT SURE MYSELF). THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT AND COMMENT AND FAVORITE ^_^

i REALLY APPRECIATE THE HELP!!!!

eNJOY!

* * *

Somebody was calling his name. Who?

"…se."

Ayase could see some blurry images. But he knows for sure those of images were Kanou-san's face. Who else will be there? Kanou-san is his only family member left. So he tried to smile although he was weak all over. The pain has long gone. He was now in a complete numbness, almost having zero sense on what's going on around him.

"…se."

The sound now sounded different. It's more effeminate and high pitched than the usual heavy cold voice of Kanou-san's.

"…se-chan!"

Chan? Kanou-san would never call him that. So who is this person calling to him?

"…" when he opened his eyes, he can see he was inside a box. Or a moving box. No. Maybe a car. It's quite dark around him. There were people around him… and they were all looking at him in concern.

"Can you hear me, madam?"

Ayase nodded so weak it almost unobservable. _Madam_? _Is it him_? _He is a madam_?

"Ayase-chan! Thank God you are still with us!"

Now he remembered the sound.

"Some..ya..san?"

"Oh, thank God!" Someya cried inside her handkerchief, while her other hand was grabbing Ayase's cold palm tightly. "I though we were too late!"

"Wh…ere… am…"

"We almost reach the hospital, hang in there! Oh, I was so panicked when I get the call from danna-sama! There was no medical help on board, and you were almost lost! Luckily the plane arrived faster 1 hour before the schedule and we could carry you out straight away…"

"Ka…nou…san…where?"

Someya was silenced. She then softly whispered. "He is… in custody now. But don't worry, he will be fine. Danna-sama will be fine."

"cus..tody?"

"The immigration officers caught him. He is now in police headquarters. But don't worry, Aya-chan. He will be beside you soon."

"I am …sorry… for troubling…"

"No! It' s fine! Oh, Ayase, it's not the matter now! Do you know that you actually have twins?"

"A…ah?"

"Kudo was trying to tell you the other day, but you said you don't want to know, so he kept his mouth shut. He told me that your condition critical. Since you have lost so much blood, the oxygen transfer must have decreased at least by half. The chance of having both twin survived is declining incredibly. So you need to undergo operation straight away. If you agree, I will take care of the hospital consent form, Ayase."

Ayase couldn't catch all the information, what he got was the very first sentence.

"Twin…?"

"Yes, Ayase. It's a twin. A girl and a boy."

Ayase looked into his memory. What was there? He remembered painfully the day… he was in one of Kudo-san's check up. Kudo was grinning ear to ear while looking at the ultrasound copy.

"_Ayase-kun! Do you want me to tell you a wonderful news?"_

Ayase thought it was all about gender of the baby, and he has decided to keep it as a surprise, so he shook his head. "_No, thank you. It's fine. I want to make it a surprise till the end."_

"_But this is not only about…" _Kudo looked lost and impatient to tell something else, but when he saw Ayase's determined eyes, he gave up. He is always weak to Ayase's eyes.

"_Fine. But I am sure you will get a double surprise on the day."_

Was that what he meant by 'double surprise'? Ayase smiled. He was talking about… twin? Happiness filled his chest. As the sensation returned, so is the pain. He flinched. God, he just remember again how painful it was. The state of numbness has successfully blocked the real pain out of his brain. And now it's returning in full throttle. His body begun to contract again; blood which was stopped started to flow again; the pale face became paler. He writhed in agony. Never again he wanted to experience this kind of pain. A pure torture.

Seeing the poor 'lady' suffering some kind of cruciating pain, all sort people around him were busy giving some sort of medical treatment to his body… but it's futile. Ayase could feel the lingering pain when they put him on the bed, and carried him into the room.

Panic. Fear. Excitement. Pain.

Ayase could hear somebody counting one to four near his ears. When he counted four, Ayase snapped into a deep sleep. It would be nice if only he doesn't need to open up his eyes anymore like that…

__________________

"So…you sure about this, Kanou-san?"

Kanou growled. "How many times should I tell you? Just make it quick so I can go to Ayase!"

"Fine." The lawyer smiled and took the whole document. Please wait. I will try my best to finish this as soon as possible."

"Hey, wait! Tell me if there is something happen with Ayase." Kanou sighed. "Those bastards didn't let me have my cell phone here."

"Of course not, Kanou-san you are the convict." The lawyer, in his 40ies, smiled and shook his hand with Kanou's. "Thank you for the business. And… the last news I know about your wife was she is being taken into hospital for an immediate caesarean."

_Caesarean?_ Kanou paled. _42% failure chance._ Ayase's pale face crossed his mind. Lost of blood, weak, plus 42% chance. Kanou punched the table into pieces.

"MAKE SURE YOU LET ME GO FROM HERE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" Kanou roared. "I need to be beside him!!!"

His roar was harsh and dangerous; even the guards around the room flinched. The man inside the convict cell looked like a beast than a man. They were scared, honestly. But Kanou's lawyer has long gone and met the court.

He was using plea bargain as his last card. Plea bargain is when a convict exchanged an information that help to resolve the case/ bigger case for enlighten in his/her punishment. He is sure that a small fry like him will measure nothing against his a million buck carp like his mother. His mother was as cunning as an eel; the International Interpol will trade anything just for a piece of proof on her. As he needs to get out of this place soon, the need comes in handy.

When he was out from Japan, he made his connections and Kuba brothers to dig as many information and proof about his dear mother's drug business. Not easy, of course. People still chose her over him, but lady luck helped him. Some group went against her because apparently she killed their leader just the other night. It was unusual for his mother to act clumsy like that. Kanou smirked whenever he thought that the old hag has lost her charm. She was practically acting on her own impulse to kill her own protégée. Kanou thought he had got all he need to make his mother realized that she is not almighty like what she thought she is. However, he was happy until yesterday. The truth about Ayase and the baby just made him lost the will to chase his mother's ass.

Kanou was sure he could be free even without the plea bargain if he had stayed in Hong Kong for another 2 days. Japan's system is quite easy when you know the loop hole. But now he needs to use his revenge to his mother as the last card. Well, it wasn't that bad either. Compare to losing Ayase…

Kanou calmed himself down. No; he need to suppress the urge of kicking the door open and run to the hospital; he needs to be cooperative until his warrant was taken away from him.

_Ayase… sorry. I couldn't be beside you now. Sorry. _

"Excuse me, Kanou-sama."

Kanou looked up and expected to see his mother standing in front of the door. But the least expected person was standing there. It was Albert; Miya's favourite butler.

"What do you want? What does _she_ want now?" Kanou was ready to punch the old guy. The butler bowed down politely.

"How do you do, Kanou-sama?"

"hhh… cut down the ethics. I am not here to drink tea with you. So what do you want?"

Albert suddenly looked so stern and serious, staring at Kanou's eyes.

"I heard that you have gathered enough proof to make a plea bargain, am I wrong?"

Kanou smirked. "Yeah. The thing I have now is enough to make every strand of her hair curled. Just you wait."

"That's what I intend to bargain now, sir." The butler bowed a bit. His broken hand was supported by a clean plaster. However, nothing else changed. The butler looked as immaculate as ever. "I am here to offer you a good exchange. I will make sure you come out from this thing as clean as a white new Egyptian cotton if you willing to grant me those details about Miya-sama."

"Sorry. Even without your help, I can get myself out of here."

"If you don't, then I sadly need to make it more difficult for you to come out from this cell, Kanou-sama."

"heh." Kanou sighed, smirked evilly. "You think you have any cards against me?"

"well, actually there are many, but I am sure you may have a counterattack or two against it. However, I can assure you that you will want to take the offer."

"And why is that?"

"Your wife is in the hospital right now. Am I right?"

"…" Kanou clenched his fist. "…and?"

"The hospital is, sadly, owned by my close acquaintance. They were actually having this big… financial problem, you see." The butler spoke casually, and he expected that both of them knows what was the threat. "So… I think it's better for you to get him out from there as soon as possible."

Kanou stopped breathing. _Someya! That okama should bring Ayase out from the hospital he is in right now!_ F**k! he didn't have his cell phone right now! Oh, shit, he really wants to kill all the people now around him and run to the place where Ayase is.

"Why… do you do this? That bitch sent you?"

"No." the butler smiled softly. "She didn't. She is still in a state of peacefulness by the pool when I left."

"So you do this out of your account? What's your motive? You want her down, do you?"

"No, it's exactly the overturn. I want Miya-sama to stay on the top. She is the best leader for the group, I believe."

"… what if I say I don't care about her? What if… I don't take the bargain?" Kanou was trying to inflict some confusion in the old man's head. He was hoping that the butler's head is rather rusty from age. But Albert smiled softly, like he was talking to a baby instead of a man of 31.

"You know how painful and scary it is to lose someone, Kanou-sama. How strong do you need to be to accept the death of a certain someone? Watching your reaction for the past few weeks, I observed you had finally found the one. You understand the need to protect your partner. And now, I am doing the same exact thing with you, my lord. I am merely trying to protect my lovely beautiful lady."

"… You make me sick. You sound like you are in love with her. Are you crazy? She is a selfish bitch. She didn't even care about others!"

"Watch your language, young man." Suddenly the tone changed. "What do you know about her to call her a bitch? She is an angel. She was just born in a wrong place. She is a respectable woman."

"… Stop it. Your praise makes me sick."

"So, back to the main topic, Kanou-sama. Would you mind to trade?"

"…. Plus your promise to net let her interfere with any of my affairs anymore. Let her rot in Uncle Sam's place."

The butler smiled when he saw Kanou's reaction.

"You've done the right thing." The butler smiled. "I promise you will never see us again. It is true, in away."

"What do you mean?"

The butler smiled creepily. "She has active cervical cancer. She has no more than 15 months to live. She checked it out when she wanted to have my baby. So… I will be glad if you call me father from now on. Greetings."

Kanou dropped his jaw. "AS IF!" he shouted, but the butler has already gone out of the room. He sighed.

As the promise, in an hour Kanou was released with nothing on his name. his lawyer was shaking his head, amazed by the luck of this man who has been convicted enough to spend the next 5 years in jail, but now freed in a mere one hour. Kanou didn't feel that great. He was in a rush. The first thing he done was manually running towards the city, but then he remembered that he didn't know the hospital address, so he called Kuba to pick him up.

_________

Kanou ran as fast as he could. He found Someya was crying beside Kudo. Kudo, at seeing Kanou, stood up straight away and run to the other side of the corridor. Kanou was faster. He caught the guy's collar.

"Where are you running to, bastard?"

"I… am not running, Kanou. I am just going to… toilet. Yes, bathroom."

"Tell me why you keep quiet about everything. And why did you give Ayase those painkillers. Abusing your doctor license now, aren't you?"

"N…No! It was just… Ayase asked me, you know… it's hard to say no when he stared at you with those orbs…"

"Did you do something to him, fu*ker?" Kanou was ready to hit the guy when suddenly the operation door was opened. Three doctors came out. When they looked at Kanou, Someya and Kudo, they nodded.

"Are you her… I mean… his family?"

"yes." Kanou pushed Kudo away and paid full attention to the doctor. "How is he?"

"We have a good and a bad news, I am afraid. So... You are the father of the child?"

"Yes." Kanou nervously swallowed down.

"We have tried what we can, but we could only save one. The other has long gone since it was deprived from oxygen for such a long time. Congratulations, you got a daughter."

"So… the boy… died?" Someya closed her mouth and started crying again.

"Yes, we are very sorry about that."

"Boy? Girl? How is Ayase???" Kanou, in panic, actually didn't really care about the baby as much as he worried about Ayase's condition. "How is he???'

As he asked the question, some nurses were pushing the bed out from the room. On top of the bed, Kanou could see pale Ayase lying motionless with IV and oxygen mask on. Kanou instinctively went to touch him, but he was brushed off by a random nurse saying that he might contaminate Ayase if he touched and asking him to wait before making contact. The doctor explained to Kanou.

"He is in deep sleep; his critical time has passed. However, what we can do now is to wait for him/her to wake up soon. And since the baby came prematurely, she will be kept inside the incubator for minimum a week. All we can do now is pray, my son. Pray for the safety of the mother and daughter."

"…. So… he will be fine?"

"yes." The doctor smiled. "But I advise you to get him to choose his treatment soon."

"What treatment?"

"the hormone treatment. After he finished the nursing (lactating) stage, please continue to check up and have the hormonal treatment. You must choose between staying as a man or continuing as a woman. If he/she continued living in the middle like this, it may cause some problem later in life, where the hormone doesn't work properly and he/she might ended up paralysed due to poor muscle control."

"…" Kanou was silenced. Someya touched his hand.

"It's fine, danna-sama. We can think about it later. But now… let's see your daughter first."

They went to the special room after thanking the doctors and watched the small creature in the glass box through a glass barrier. Kanou looked down and found a small, red creature, human-like, moving its hand softly like it was waving at him. So small, even smaller than Ayase, smaller than his arm. It looked soft and delicate. Frail like her mother. If only the boy survived, he would look like Kanou, maybe.

Kanou was silenced. Nothing can describe his feeling at that time. All he knew was he suddenly having the tears steaming down his cheek. He closed his eyes, and for once, he thanked God that he is alive. He banged the glass barrier to dispense his tension. Someya smiled softly and patted his childhood fellow's back.

"You have done it. She is a splendid daughter. Congratulations, Somuku."

* * *

END.

WELL, NOT REALLY. I MEAN THE MAIN STORY PLOT END HERE. I MIGHT MAKE ANOTHER CHAPTER OF EPILOGUE(?) AFTER THIS.

PLEASE REVIEW? PLEASE FAVORITE?

THANK YOU FOR READING THIS!

(do you think it's better for Ayase to stay as aboy or continuing as a woman? hohoho... just asking. but i think i will make another chapter just to explain the rest of the story.)


	18. Epilogue

Well, people, let's have an agreement first.

One. Let's pretend we don't know science and genetics (all right, I know this is too much. Ayase's gene seemed like recessive—blond and blue eyes… its recessive against brown hair-eye of Kanou's.)

Two. Since I am a sucker in making names, I make the name Tsukiya (moon-ya—the phase 'ya' I take from Ayase's name: Yukiya which mean snow-ya. Well, there you go). Hahahaha. Sorry. I know this is not funny. And I have chosen a name from Kanou's name for the boy. Please bear with me.

And I didn't know what happen to Miya either, so yeah… I wouldn't elaborate on her this time.

Well, pretty much we are set.

Enjoy.

* * *

"Mom, can you give me this ring?"

"No, Tsukiya. This is the treasure dad gives to me, so I can't give you this."

Ayase smiled to the 5 years old blonde infant beside him. The girl, with golden locks and full, naturally blushing cheek was smiling and looking at the shining object. It was a plain band; inside written initial of S & Y. Tsukiya stared hard at the object. The object and its pair never separate from his mother or his father's fingers, unless they were washing dishes. It took her attention some time last week since her mother always kisses it unconsciously. Her mother will kiss it when he was folding the clothes. Her mother will kiss it when her father called from office. Her mother will kiss it whenever he smiles.

"Mom, what are you doing?"

"We are making bento for tomorrow. Isn't it your birthday?"

The small girl smiled happily. She looked hungrily at the bento boxes scattered around the table, filled with delicious yet beautiful food. And she turned back her head.

"Mom, why did we must go to the graveyard every time I have birthday? Aki-chan from my class said that her birthday was celebrated in pretty hotel with a lot of balloons and clowns. Why can't I have them in the graveyard too?"

Ayase was frozen for a second. And then he smiled while washing off his hand from soaps, placed the ring back into his wedding finger and lifted Tsukiya from the kitchen table. He knows sooner or later his daughter will ask the question. The question about why they always go to graveyard instead of celebrating her birthday inside a posh restaurant. Ayase has tried his best to not remind himself of this, and Kanou understood better than to push Ayase to explain. Ayase was bidding his time to tell his daughter. It was strange enough that his daughter has a man as mother. It was still unreal even for Ayase, like a dream. If only Tsukiya is not there, Ayase would have just thought of the whole situation as a dream and buried the memories inside his deepest mind. He, a male, is actually a hermaphrodite and gave birth. He now treated with hormone therapy and returned back to a male side of gender, but deep down, he could feel sometimes he wants to be a woman, just to make Tsukiya and Kanou looked normal. It is abnormal to have a male wife and a male mother, isn't it?

Kanou-san was so supportive. He respected Ayase's decision to be back as a guy. He knows that Kanou always wish that Ayase will somehow turn into a woman, mainly for easier sex activity, so Kanou won't be called a homo whenever they are together and Kanou did tell him that actually he wished more children. But the grief was unbearable. When Ayase learnt that he had a dead son, he cried into devastating state, almost broke down and was sent to a mental hospital for a month. Ayase blocked away the reality from his mind, not reacting to any stimulation presented by the doctors and professionals. Ayase remembered how in the end Kanou begged him to come back to his common sense, shouting his name and hugged him tightly, reminding Ayase that he still have another daughter, the survived one of the twin, to attend to. Upon realizing that, Ayase eventually came back from his catatonic state, crying and sobbing while apologizing to Kanou.

Yes, he will never want to have another child. The pain of the thought of losing it will be almost unbearable. He still wants to be available to receive Kanou's love at the same time of his rejection of getting pregnant; and thus the decision was made. He was treated with male hormones and at the moment, it has been going smoothly.

Ayase sighed.

"Mom, you ok? You look sick." Tsukiya touched his mother's face. "Do you need your medicine again?" She has learned that her mother is actually not really as strong as her father.

"No, dear. Not. This is not sickness. Listen carefully, mom have another thing to tell you."

"Yes?"

Ayase smiled. His daughter is truly bright. Despite of the premature birth, nothing seemed affected. Although she was suffering from weak lungs as a baby, now she has grown into a very healthy girl. She has a bright mind, good strong nature (although sometimes it is frighteningly similar to Kanou's mind), with hobby collecting money (she gets this every time she helped Kanou and she has surprisingly become very good in remembering business numbers and terms, despite only 5 years old) and flower (she likes to give those flowers to her mother, who will happily put it on the vase). Ayase knows that Tsukiya will grow into a fine beautiful young lady; she is already something like a queen inside her kindergarten class. Ayase only smiled awkwardly every time the teachers congratulate him about Tsukiya's perfect results in class/ tell Ayase about how actually she has every students in the class under her command/ warned Ayase due to *censored* words she kept repeating in class (thanks to Kanou).

"We couldn't have party in graveyard. It's supposed to be silent and peaceful there."

"Then, can we celebrate it somewhere else?"

"No, Tsukiya. We need to be there. Actually… there lies your brother."

"Brother?"

"yes, Tsukiya. Your brother is there, sleeping peacefully."

"Then we should wake him up! I want to play together! What's his name, mother?"

Ayase swallowed. "… His name is Tsumoku. He couldn't join us, Tsukiya… he is de…" Ayase couldn't continue the sentence, but the small girl outspoke him faster.

"dead?" Tsukiya frowned. "why? I haven't even seen him yet!"

Ayase looked at his daughter. "do you understand what dead means?"

"Yes. Father told me that. The dead couldn't come back. But they will still live here." She pointed at her chest, "so as long as we remember, they will still be beside us. But I never remember brother's face, mother. So I need to see."

Ayase smiled painfully. "Sorry, Tsukiya. We don't have his picture. But… we don't need to see as long as we care, right? So just put in mind, you have a deceased twin brother. I hope you can always cherish him with you."

"Yes. So… is that why we need to celebrate the birthday there? So brother wouldn't get lonely?"

"yes." Ayase nodded. "yes." _Sorry._ He whispered to himself. _Because of my incompetent you lost your brother. Sorry for having to spend your birthdays in the graveyard. Sorry, Tsukiya. Sorry. _

_____________

"I am home." Kanou opened the door.

"Father~! Welcome~!" Tsukiya immediately glomped to her father's tall figure. Her father smiled and put her on top his shoulder.

"Welcome home." Ayase smiled. Kanou bowed to receive the usual welcome back kiss from his spouse, and then proceed to play with Tsukiya.

As Ayase was busy preparing the meal, Kanou whispered to his daughter.

"Have you been good today?"

"Yes, dad." Tsukiya smirked. "So… can I have my promised 2 bucks?"

"Yeah. But after you help me with more documents."

"Hee? A new deal?"

"I got an easy one today." Kanou smirked. "I get it just for you. You will be happy with this deal. And today I will teach you how to read stock market share."

"Great~!" Tsukiya smiled. "I couldn't wait!" She loves money as much as she loves her parents. Maybe Kanou's blood is dominating her in many ways. But she has solely Ayase's looks. Kanou knows that his daughter will be a pretty bomb shell when she grows up, but with his cunning mind. Perfect woman. Kanou swore he will never surrender her to any guy out there—they are not worthy of her.

"What are you two whispering about?" Ayase smiled while serving the rice. Both the father and daughter were so close and Ayase was rather suspicious that Kanou was actually teaching bad stuff to his daughter. "I wouldn't want to force you to tell me, but if this will make Tsukiya talked another bad word in class, I would like you to stop, Kanou-san."

"No, Ayase. Calm down." Kanou chuckled. "We are not discussing something bad, aren't we, Tsukiya?"

Tsukiya nodded eagerly. They are really 'thick as thieves', 'like father like daughter' proverbs.

Ayase smiled. "So… tomorrow we will go to the usual place."

Kanou smiled softly, touching Ayase's hand. "Yes. I have my work postpone until 2 tomorrow. So we can enjoy ourselves there. Hey, you are 6 tomorrow!"

Tsukiya smiled proudly and nodded.

Ayase smiled thankfully and then sat down. "By the way, Someya san and Kudo san is going to get married next week. Tsukiya, would you want to be a flower girl?"

"yes!!!!"

_____________

"Tsukiya, its bed time. Kanou-san; please put her in bed." Ayase shouted from the living room. Both father and daughter came to realization that they had been spending 2 hours reading and analysing stock market.

"All right. Kid, now it's bed time." Kanou patted his daughter's hair. "You need sleep."

"But I still want to look after those market stock remote..." Tsukiya whined. But she knows it's useless against her father, so she sighed. "All right, I'll read it tomorrow at school."

"Hey, didn't we promise you will pretend you don't know how to read at school? I don't want some teacher got stroke after listening to you reading those market share documents."

"Yeah, dad. I understand. I am not that dumb to get caught, don't you know?" she smirked. "I am going to sleep now. And… you owe me another 5 bucks for tonight dad."

Kanou smirked. "5 bucks? I thought I have given you last fortnight?"

"Yea. But this is already the third day… I think you will want another silent night with mom, do you?" Tsukiya smiled cunningly. "So, 5 bucks or I won't sleep 'silently' tonight, dad."

Kanou sighed. "Fine. You'll get it tomorrow."

"A man will never lick his own saliva, nee?" Tsukiya smiled. "Dad, read bedtime story to me, please~?" she asked in a girly tone that made Kanou sighed coz he knows he would never wins against Tsukiya's begging face (Tsukiya really looked like smaller version of Ayase in his eyes).

"Which one?"

"Anything. They are boring enough to put me into sleep in 3 pages. If you tell me to read documents, I can never sleep."

"Fine." Kanou kissed his daughter cheek and pulled her up. "Let's go to bed."

_________

"Kanou..san… please… not tonight… Ah~!" Ayase begged his husband to stop. "Tsukiya might hear…"

"She wouldn't." Kanou answered. _He had already damn given her 5 bucks for this._

"Kanou…san…"

"Yukiya, didn't I tell you to call my name?"

Ayase blushed. "But…"

"No but. There is no better pleasure than have you call my name when we climaxed."

Kanou kissed Ayase's neck gently. "Come on."

Ayase sighed. They have been married for almost 6 years now. Their lifestyle has changed since Tsukiya came. But the perverted Kanou never ceased to attack him, in every 3 days interval. Ayase knows Kanou was trying to reduce Ayase's trauma of getting pregnant and losing his baby by slowly increasing the reduced 'fun time'.

"…fine." Ayase kissed Kanou's lips softly. "…Somuku."

Kanou could feel his libido increased to a higher level and they spend the night sleepless on the bed.

Something was never meant to change.

FIN.

* * *

yes~! I FINISH IT!!!

Hey, can i have the review for the whole story as usual? so i can improve myself for next time~!

Thank you for reading, especially Polunkinsha-san, Onige-a-san, jpnhg1243-san, Kittyzala-san, Yaoifangilr89, Master of Yaoi1326-san, mdevries-san and all the people who have reviewed me so long~!(sorry for spelling, sorry for not putting all the name, and see you next time~!)

especially for Twelf Bell san, my dear beta san~!

Thank you~!


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